I don't know how to start... I can't pay for the simple necessities at times - my ex left us and doesn't send a cent - he hasn't even contacted any of the children for almost two years....I can't pay for a pair of shoes for one child or I won't be able to pay rent...How am I going to afford a wedding for another? I'm working on the worst stuff in therapy that has got me with flashbacks and urges that would be destructive....but I am progressing... The school I work for is facing major economic challenges and I am the CFO...so I see it first.... Out of seven wonderful children - all need me so much for support and care....I have to be there for them I have no other family - all are dead or gone..... No one is "there" for me. I feel like giving up - so many horrible things have happened to me and I have, for the most part, shielded my kids...but I am having a real hard time hanging on.