So today I hand another hangout date with my friend Y. I want to think it went well. However, I just don't know. We sat around and watched anime for a couple of hours. Which was nice, it was nice to watch anime with someone new. However, it was as awkward as the first time we went to the movies. We made small conversation here and there... however... it does not really feel like we advanced in our comfort around each other. Which is something I want to be able to do. I want to be comfortable with her. The reason why, I wussed out. I said "Lets take a walk down this trail near my place then watch some anime or we can just watch anime if you are feeling super lazy." She was feeling super lazy so we just watched anime. I should have said "Lets go for a walk". another chance to try to break down the walls of our shyness gone. :blub: what the fuck is wrong with me. If anything I could have sat next to her on the couch. That might have helped break down some walls. Why can't I have the courage to start letting her into my life. Why can't I make conversations? Why can't I do anything a real man should be able to do. Oh well.. I am tried... plenty of time to sleep and regret before work tomorrow.