I've been psychically ill since 2006 and after several years of treatment, since 2009, I've yet to go into remission or get any relief from the symptoms (horrible pain, chills, migraines, anxiety.. The list is too long to complete here) despite pain and anxiety meds. I was forced to stop all pain and anxiety meds and am now a wreck. The only thing keeping me from commuting suicide is the thought of the sadness it would cause my mom and boyfriend.. And it sounds dumb but every time I look at my dog I don't want to leave him either. But I cannot face the rest of my life in pain from a disease that is usually treatable. I feel like a complete burden financially and emotionally to everyone close to me, which is few bc I have lost touch with almost all of my friends bc this illness is so isolating. I'm just ready to give up and I know exactly how I will do it. As much as I want to die I don't want to make my mom cry. But I cry all day every day. I don't remember the last time I was truly happy.