too tired to fight any more

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by dew2little, May 16, 2010.

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  1. dew2little

    dew2little Member

    I lost someone tonight to cancer. It's been a long fight for him, but finally he has walked on and now has no worries. I went for a walk to clear my head and now I've come home to no one... I sat here for some time in the dark while my pills kept calling me. You know I'm not scared, I'm really at peace with every thing. I've lived a troubled life but now it's time for this chapter to end. I don't want to hurt any more, I just want to go to sleep. I'm sure in the future things will be better. I'm just tired... Tired of life... tired of hurting... I want to join my friends that have walked on before me.

    I'm not sure what will really happen tonight, what ever does I'm ok. Please know I tried, I tried to fight, I fought for too many years now.

    I don't have people I truly call friends so I really don't have anyone to say good bye to.

    The walls are up, the darkness is coming, I'm ready for the silence.

    I'm so tired now...
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Your friend fought a valiant battle with his cancer he fought and would want you to fight as well your illness. sleep if you must but know death is not the answer geting well is your friend would want that for you
  3. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend..
    violet is right..your friend would want you to keep fighting...
    give yourself some time and are grieving for your friend and it's not the time to make decisions about suicide.....
    we are here for you to stay and talk...
    Last edited by a moderator: May 16, 2010
  4. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    Hang in there hun... im so sorry for you loss :hug:
  5. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    I understand how you feel having lost several friends, you cant understand or comprehend the lose or understand it, believe me I know how much it hurts.

    As clich├ęd as it sounds, and I am no believer in heaven, But I think of them looking down on me being proud that I am still here-knowing that one day I will meet there kind souls again, just now is not my time.

    Would they truly want you to give in now? I doubt it very much, I dont know you and I wouldn't want you to give up the fight now.
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