Top 10 reasons to Kill myself: *TRIGGER*

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Pie King, Jun 28, 2007.

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  1. Pie King

    Pie King New Member

    First off let me tell you a little about myself: I'm young bearly an adult, my body is healthy and of normal weight, I read often and I have normal or slightly higher then normal IQ, I don't drink, Don't smoke, I don't use drugs, I go to church on Sundays, And belive in honor and love. Pretty good guy right?

    So what would make someone like me want to kill myself? Well heres the top ten reasons:

    Top 10 reasons to Kill myself:
    #1 I am a Pedophile
    #2 I am Gay except for little girls
    #3 I have no Job
    #4 I have no money
    #5 I have no friends
    #6 I have no family which will talk to me
    #7 I can't talk to someone 5min without Lieing about somthing little
    #8 I hate everything
    #9 I live in a fantasy world
    #10 I am weak, both in heart and body

    Theres no My life sucks reason you might notice. Because my life is better then most. I do have mental illnesses such as being a Pedophile and Gay, those being my top two reasons to want to kill myself. The no Job and No money I could fix. But I've lost the will to want to work. Why? to rent a wooden box from someone to live in, crap, work, eat, work, and crap again. What a pointless existance.

    The no friends or family have a lot to do with the lieing. I am a Compulsive Lier. I don't lie about big things either. Just little stupid things that I have no real way of hiding. It just leaves my mouth before I even know I am lying. Another mental illnesses I suppose. #8 is a little childish, I should say I enjoy nothing. I don't like music, I don't enjoy sex, foods lost its flavor, I enjoy nothing and becuase of that Hate everything.

    My fantasy world has a lot to do with what other people say about me. The one time I broke down so bad I went for help all he could say after listening to me talk for an hour was I needed more friends and to stop reading fantasy books because they somtime delut ones reality and that I showed symptoms of someone living in a fantasy world. No Du I need more friends, To bad I can't let anyone close to me without trying to hurt. Maybe if I could just find one person on this earth I could trust I might have a friend.

    And the last one, well the fact I am posting this shows I am weak. I should go into the other room, Grab the sword my roommate has and fall onto it. He spends hours with a sharp stone on it, It cut my finger with by me only touching it to see how sharp it is. If I held it over my chest and fell.....But alas that would be to painful. I want a painless death. For I am weakhearted.

    You can't say you don't hate me, Just the fact that I am a Pedophile makes millions of people wish for my death every second of every day. I've never done anything to bad, so I should kill myself now and die without my true name being cursed by every mother in the world. Yes, that would be the right thing to do, wouldn't it?
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 29, 2007
  2. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    Re: Top 10 reasons to Kill myself:

    I don't hate you. I have compassion for you and it must be awful to to have a real proclivity for something that is so inherently wrong. But think of pedophilia as a drug addiction. It is wrong to do it, it will only hurt you and others. You may struggle with this, but please, join a support group, get rid of your computer if you must, but do not indulge in this behavior, because it does hurt and destroy people's lives. You can still be a good, decent person who deserves a shot at life.
  3. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    Re: Top 10 reasons to Kill myself:

    I am sorry you want to kill yourself. I do hope you don't kill yourself, and I wish you the best. I'm sorry I can't get into this much more to be honest, it was triggering to read about molesting children I was raped and sexually abused as a child. But please do take care.
  4. Pie King

    Pie King New Member

    Re: Top 10 reasons to Kill myself:

    I am sorry Carolyn, I know I didn't molest you, but someone who was probably a lot like me did. As for my peanut0017, I never compaired it to a drug addiction but there is a lot in common. Still No Pedophile Anynomus to get help with. But I got other problems too....That one is just by far the worst.
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