I've been looking at things the past few days and realizing what a loser I am. All the people I was in the Army with have great jobs, families, children, friends and look happy. I have nothing, no job, no family, no friends. When I went to the VA for help, they laughed and screamed at me. I have no where to go. I need more back surgery. For what? So I can continue with this crap? I don't want to do it anymore. I keep starting over again. I have no health insurance and no where to go. I can't keep friends or a job. My last boyfriend that I lived with tried to hit me with a shovel. So now I'm staying with the only friend I have. She's going to get sick of me being here soon. I had to leave my cats behind. I'm tired of all this. I can't start over again.