Total Loser

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by melimorgue, Jan 8, 2011.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. melimorgue

    melimorgue Member

    I've been looking at things the past few days and realizing what a loser I am. All the people I was in the Army with have great jobs, families, children, friends and look happy. I have nothing, no job, no family, no friends. When I went to the VA for help, they laughed and screamed at me. I have no where to go. I need more back surgery. For what? So I can continue with this crap? I don't want to do it anymore. I keep starting over again. I have no health insurance and no where to go. I can't keep friends or a job. My last boyfriend that I lived with tried to hit me with a shovel. So now I'm staying with the only friend I have. She's going to get sick of me being here soon. I had to leave my cats behind. I'm tired of all this. I can't start over again.
     
  2. OhneDich

    OhneDich Well-Known Member

    Yes, you can start it all over again... you just need to find some more strenght, and you WILL FIND IT, hun.

    This friend... I don't think she'll get tired of you. Why would she?

    Please, raise your head and start walking for life again...
     
  3. OhneDich

    OhneDich Well-Known Member

    If you want someone to talk, you can pm me... I'm going now, but at night I'll be back.
    You're not a loser... :)
     
  4. melimorgue

    melimorgue Member

    I'm on morphine for my back. I just don't want to fuck it up this time. I used pills before. Klonopin. Someone found me and took me to a hospital. I feel completely disconnected. I haven't been able to make or keep a connection since I left the Army. I've accomlished nothing in the past ten years other than starting over a bunch of times. It's really hard to make something out of nothing. They told me I woke up from back surgery looking for my rifle and screaming about iraqis coming. Things just keep getting worse. I have no taste. I'm never hungry. I don't sleep for more than 2 hours at a time. I am in constant pain.
     
  5. OhneDich

    OhneDich Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry you're feeling this way... I've never been through it, and whatever I say, I'll do it trying to help but knowing I have no conscience of what you're dealing with...

    How long has been since you left the Army? The back surgery was because of it?

    What I can say to you is things will get better. Seems hard, impossible, you might feel completely "strenghtless", but with a step at a time you'll get there... you're not alone, you can count on me if you want...
     
  6. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Have you got the veteran affairs helping you with this There is a vet hot line even you can call. You sound like you need some therapy for your trauma you are having flashbacks. The army should be supplying you with help with therapy if not get a hold of your congressmen someone in vet affairs to set up the help you need. You should not be fighting this alone NO way You served your country now your country needs to serve you. Call okay Vet affairs someone in power get the therapy and treatment you deserve. hugs
     
  7. melimorgue

    melimorgue Member

    I tried to go to VA. They treated me like shit. The doctor yelled and screamed at me. He accused me of trying to get money. I was discharged from Army with a personality disorder. I found out later they did that to keep me from getting benefits. At one point he called me retarded. That was in 2006. Things just keep getting worse. I don't have anywhere to go. I can't make anything work. I can't even walk in the door of that place. I tried to call and find out if they had different doctors but no one can tell me. My back is hurt because of my previous job. I complained about sexual harassment from my boss and the retaliation was to make me pack up heavy equipment and lift boxes for a week. I asked over and over for a transfer for 4 months before that. They fired me after I got hurt. Now I'm disabled and unemployed. I feel like this everyday and I can't do it anymore. I'm waiting for a months supply of morphine. I don't want to screw it up this time.
     
  8. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    They did the same to my twin tried to say she was ill prior to going into army. so they did not have to give her medical pension. I know they treat their veterans cruel but if you were hurt on your job you should be on workmenscomp and it is up to that job that fired you to put in a claim for it and to follow up with getting you a job that you can do. Go to labor board and talk to someone there let them know what happen Legally they have to
    With regards to the army i know how they treat the people that served them and it is horrific Have you thought about going to the news about this as well.
    Maybe someone there will take up you cause for help hugs.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.