i am going in to total melt down over my life and where i seen to be headed at the moment. the only problem is that i don't actually know where it is that i am head coz every time i spend time to reflect on whats actually going:apologetic: on i seem to be confused and brake down crying over my confusion and lack of direction. don't get me wrong, i have never really know or had any direction. i used to be a high powered salesman and on top of my game in life, now i can only read my name before i go crazy and get fed up with reading. i be4 i was on the phone or dining with clients and now i cant bear the thought of leaving the house or sometimes even the room i am in to to to the loo. i just an so wrapped up in my 'faults' (and believe my therapist when she says, i have many) that i am totally debilitated and cut off from who i am anymore that i cant even function in my own little life never mind others. i don't sleep and at. these things have become too much of a burden. playing with my children is now such a stress that i go to smoke every 5 min. i am just at tethers end and any advice would be welcome. i just cant switch off from my brain that even relaxation therapy is not working. i am of 5mg of sleeping pills and by body is too tense to accept it. short of a bolt to the brain i don't know what to do. truth be told a bolt would be great if i only i could get the damn thing to fire please help P.S don't feed me crap that killing myself wot help, that's not the advice i need right now.