Totally Lost

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by yoshi1985, Nov 12, 2013.

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  1. yoshi1985

    yoshi1985 Member

    i am 27 i turned it in sept, i had a decent job wokring at a bank in the carolinas. was making 40 k. i went to school and have a baclhors in accounting. However i cant seem to find a decent job. the only reason i had the jbo at the bank was i knew somebody.

    i got fired from the bank, coudlnt collect, now im back in new england with my parents

    down south was great i had dates all the time, i was dating a girl , she wasnt gonna be my wife but it was nice to be in a relationship and have someone to hold at night.

    im trying to decide goin back to school. but have no money dont know if its worht the loans and the moeny to go back.

    im at my parents house, pennieless, i always had toruble dating in new england and i dont think things will improve

    i see things as getting worse, wont get a decent job, wont find a wife,

    i see things as gettign worse not getting better.

    i think im a complete fuck up and i do have suiciadal thoughts.

    as the days go by i dont see things improving.

    i hope this stie helps im new to it
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi youshi How long have you been back in England with the job market being as it is i can understand why it is so hard to get a job.
    You are not the only one struggling so you are not a f up you aren't you are young and you will find you way. Just have to keep putting resumes out there In regards to relationships get involved by volunteering somewhere or taking just a course of interest that will improve your chances of getting a job
    If you can find the girls out where you were then you can where you are now. I am glad you are here you will make new friends here in time
    No one knows what the future will bring you ok i did not find my guy until i was 28 Hold on ok things will turn around they will
  3. yoshi1985

    yoshi1985 Member

    I lost my job in begginign of august, moved back end of september. i got some seasonal job leads but its less than half of what i was making with no benifits
    i will try vollenteering
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Just wanted to say welcome to the site. Volunteering does sound like a good choice for you right now. Suicide is not the answer. Don't give up hope!
  5. Bezdin

    Bezdin New Member

    *hugs* i know life is just unbearable :( hang in there *hugs*
  6. yoshi1985

    yoshi1985 Member

    i guess its nice to talk about things. i jsut look at the future and it doenst look good ive literally sent out 300 plus applications / resumes and i dont get anythign back. its seems liek that accounitng degree is useless
  7. yoshi1985

    yoshi1985 Member

    things arnt going good. i drive to work part time retail which is ALOT less money than what i was making at the bank.
    anyway im haivng sucidal thoughts all day i really dont think im gonna do it but i do think about it alot.
    i drive past a bride that has anti suicide signs, and the smartins number. i read it and thouight thts nice i can call before i decide to jump. than i realized i have no damm minutes on my phone to call casue im broke.
    i dont know it seems like a good idea sometimes
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