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Tough session

Discussion in 'Therapy and Medication' started by total eclipse, Aug 10, 2009.

  1. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Okay i opened up more but now feel very nauseous like why did i open this door. Therapist kept using that word I wish i told him to stop saying it it makes me sick. Ihope i don't have nightmares tonight. I have decide like before its time perhaps to change or run again stupid emotions coming back
    session are only going to get tougher and i don't know if i have it in me but i know it has to be done somehow to get past all this BS.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Okay in session under control now little pangs of pain come in jolts trying not to think keeping busy. Why is it i can keep control in therapy keep my composure and then afterward seems like word stuck in my head and i don't want it there god how do you stop replay of what went through therapy
    next time no words no saying things god i kept myself together then why is it hard to do now Thinking maybe not a good idea to do this getting frightened now what night time will bring. I have to become someone else thats all pretend again not let past overwhelm me right I did this before changed stop remembering i can do this now just change again right.
  3. alison

    alison Well-Known Member

    Hey Violet.. maybe you could let your therapist know all of this? If you think you're going to have a difficult time verbalizing what you're trying to say, maybe you could even just print out what you've written here, because I think you've articulated it perfectly.

    I don't know your situation or what door you've opened with your therapist, but unfortunately I do think that in order for you to heal you'll need to work this out, even if it causes more pain at the moment. However, maybe your therapist is moving too quickly and could slow it down a bit? Or maybe it would help for him/her to avoid using certain words that make it difficult for you?

    I guess my major advice is to keep going to therapy.. but definitely let your therapist know how you feel! And *HUGS*!!
  4. Oceans

    Oceans Well-Known Member

    hi Violet

    therapy is hard work as you have experienced. Keep talking or writing which ever way works best for you. therapist are trained to deal with handling what you bring up.

    The feeling of regret when you've told something that you didn't planned but hopefully in the end, this helps us heal and move through life more better.

    I hope things work out the best for you and keep us updated.

    take care

    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 11, 2009
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    feel its time tired depressed want to leave trust him but not me
    lost a little calf the other day bull stepped on him told hubby to move calf but he didn't funny how the weak get trampled on how hard they try to survive but then fate takes over and gone no more little calf
    i am tired oh god so tired sad depressed so fff tired all the time
    why didn't he just move the calf when i said but he knows everythng i hate this feeling i hate being weak near the end again don't even see me
    rambling now but understand more and more there is no place for weak and sensitve no place to survive for the life of me i try i gave it a good fight all these years but im tired whycan't i just sleep i need to go away the word is just a word but my mind is tired of its games let me go please god
    im tired tired no longer can i be strong.