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train tracks

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Forum Buddy
My husband thinks there nothing wrong ... am in the bed room and my husband is in the living room playing his games , talking to a friend on x box .

I dont want to say anything and spoil his happy mood and his fun

I'll be fine just my mind is fucked at the moment and its thinking a way of me dying
I have my 16 year old niece and her boyfriend here but there still sleeping

i cant even slit my wrists right ...i dont cut deep enough and there is the pain as well.

I cant OD because my husband now has all the pills some where else were i cant get them

what other options do i have ?
nothing i can do with out my husband noticing am doing something
Maybe i can walk out the house go to the train station and jump the lines
I dream about doing that at night my voices tell me to go and do it
I can hear the trains the noise of them going over the tracks
I will just lay there ready for death to come

He would notice me leave ...come after me ...tell me to come home

I should get ready to go ... maybe he wont notice this time

total eclipse

SF Friend
Staff Alumni
other options is to stay
safe and loved with your husband
get your meds changed a bit so these thought are not as frequent okay
stay here with us keep talking so we can help too hugs


Forum Buddy
told my husband what i was wanting to do he is supportive
the train tracks keep calling me over and over ....
My husband locked the front door so i cant get out.
We are going out later to an AA meeting as its important that i go there .


Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend
You don't want to jump in front of s train.. It will mangle your body all to hell.. Then there is the possibilty that you won't die instantly..You will just lie there missing limbs and bleeding out..Those are the hard facts..You need to put your effort in getting better.. Join a depression group where you are talking to people with the same problems..Your husband is a hell of a guy in my book.. He obviously loves you...
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