I don't know what to do. I need to get out of this apartment, I need to get away, but my mother says if I leave, she will call the police and tell them I "threatened to commit suicide", like I freaking said it to cause her trouble! Aren't you supposed to say something when you're feeling that way? I just need some air, but she won't let me leave. I feel like the walls are closing in around me, I'm suffocating and I want to scream and rip my skin off but all I can do is sit her crying, while she sleeps in the front room. I don't know what to do, I feel like I"m going to suffocate and explode all at once! There's not even any booze in the house, so I can't escape that way. I am freaking losing it! I'm sorry, please, help me think of something to do, I am going to hurt myself if I don't find something to do with this pain and this scream welling up in my chest!