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trauma anniversary and depression TRIGGER

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by merlinrune, Jun 17, 2012.

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  1. merlinrune

    merlinrune Member

    I am quickly approaching my anniversary of my trauma on Wednesday the 20th. My PTSD is one thing but the depression is another.

    I am not sure that I can go through another anniversary. Especially since my depression is not responding to any of the prescribed medications.

    I admit that I have a plan and the means with which to carry it out. I know that its wrong and that I need an intervention. I am supposed to see my therapist on Tuesday but I am not going to show up because I am going to be somewhere else.

    I am tired. I am lost. I am numb, and I no longer care. I know that these are not reasons to jump from that cliff but there is so much more to my story and I would just like to think of it as one horrible ass nightmare that never happened. But the PTSD won't let that happen.

    I have never missed any of my appointments in two years. Its time to miss it now.
  2. Wastingecho

    Wastingecho Well-Known Member

    the meds are the most frustrating parts for me - can't find anything that works for me either

    i always have a plan as well - usually multiple based on where i may be traveling or what i may be doing - sometimes it's so bad i carry what i need with me

    on the other hand i've been doing this for a long damn time - and i'm afraid that one day i'll follow through and leave it all behind

    so i have to wake every day, remind myself of this and say today is not that day

    if you have a good relationship with your therapist maybe you could give them a call

    if you'd rather talk to someone else, pm me or drop into the chat room if you can

    and if things get really hard, please try to call a hotline

    you don't have to be alone, okay?
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