Tried everything

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by LostInPain, Jun 21, 2014.

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  1. LostInPain

    LostInPain Well-Known Member

    I first came here 6 months ago, extremely depressed, highly emotional and like many who can't see any way out, began seriously considering suicide. Everyone said that I'd had no history of problems, no history of suicidal thoughts - I'd just been through a divorce, lost my family, lost my job, moved to a city where I know no one. Rough but everyone said I needed time. I've done everything an intelligent person is supposed to. I found a highly qualified and credentialed therapist and began weekly counseling sessions (she says I'm passively suicidal - means I wish I would drop dead every day, but don't have the nerve to put a bullet in myself), I spoke with my doctor and was prescribed meds. I'm trying to exercise. I go to work and put on a smiling face for the world every day. Well it's been over half a year and it looks like I'm not getting better. My state of mind is much more resigned, less hysterical and emotional now than it once was. The thing is, I'm becoming seriously convinced that this passive suicidal wish is just prolonging what's looking more and more inevitable - the change to becoming actively suicidal. Not really looking for help here. No one can help me. Just venting my thoughts into the void.
     
  2. JV3

    JV3 Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry to hear about what you're going through. I've seen this come up a lot lately, where people who have been going to therapy or taking meds haven't had much progress. I've been there more than once, and I've been in situations where I was suicidal and depressed for years at a time. I understand it can seem hopeless. Therapy and meds aren't going to be everyone's answer, but it is a good starting place. Sometimes what you need is a new friendship, or something to get involved in, or reading about and relating to other people who go through the same emotions and situations as you, or maybe you'll find something in a church or new hobby. Personally, I think a great place to start is to take a close look at the things your feeling and possible external causes; then, come up with some ways to make slight adjustments in your life. Experiment with different changes and see if anything helps. You don't have to be in a hurry either. Take your time and see what helps. Even little victories and small things you might change that have slight improvements in your life can add up over time.
     
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