I OD'd. I thought the hardest part of it would be forcing myself to swallow them - but I had enough willpower to do that. The hard part was forcing myself to wait for it to happen, so I ended up calling myself an ambulance. It was an awful, humiliating experience. I upset quite a few people as well, and I hate what I did to them. I also disappointed a few. I don't intend to do anything like it again. The whole thing was incredibly embarrassing, and of course I regret it, but the experience turned out to be a good one, based on the outcome and the things it made me realise. I have a lot more hope now. I hope others who suffer suicidal thoughts try to listen to the incredibly quiet voice in the back of their mind telling them NOT to do it. I wasn't being rational, despite how rational the thoughts seemed at the time. Hope you guys stay safe.