tried twice and still failed

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by aqua, Oct 6, 2013.

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  1. aqua

    aqua Banned Member

    took two over dose in the last few days, was imagining things, and getting so paranoid, I was hoping that would have finalized
    things and ended my life, I have tried to live a proper life, I will be gone soon, I cant take this world any longer, I have gone back
    to cutting and<mod edit - methods> to help me along this journey, I am alone now , when the shit hits the fan everyone
    leaves. even those you thought would never go
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 7, 2013
  2. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    Hi Aqua. I am really sorry that you are in SO much pain. sounds like the pain is beyond words. sometimes people find community here. I have made friends here and we keep each other going. I know you do not want to, but I hope you will hang on. I hope you can use this community as a way to hang on. We are all in similar boat here. helping each other to get through. Some are feeling better today, this week, this year. Others not so much. But we all have something in common. So many feel abandoned. Alone. left. Can I ask you what you were imagining? Sometimes there can be medical help for things like that. If you would want. I hope we can get to know you more. That you will become a regular member of this community. Its my favorite online community. And believe me, I have tried many
     
  3. aqua

    aqua Banned Member

    Flowers it may sound crazy, but I imagine everyone is watching me, hearing sounds in my room, I start talking but don't make sense, no one is there. I know this sounds weird but that's going on in my head. to the NYJmpMaster I apologize for what you had to remove.
     
  4. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    Aqua., thanks for posting the answer. What can help the kind of thing you are taking about is medications. Do you have any way of finding a psychiatrist? I have known people who talked about similar things that you wrote. and medications made a big difference. Just have to find the right psychiatrist to prescribe the right medications. Do you have a way to do that? If not I will try to help you to know how to find someone. Also working with a psychotherapist who is familiar with what you describe will help. Believe me, there is help. so just hang in there. okay?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 7, 2013
  5. aqua

    aqua Banned Member

    Flowers, i had medications but stopped because i always felt drugged and my brain was in a cloud, i have just lost my psychiatrist he no longer takes my insurance, i know that my brain is tripping out and i have fallen into this depression, things just seem dark and bleak
     
  6. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    oh Aqua. I am so sorry to hear that you lost the help of your psychiatrist. Are you committed to not taking medications? I know that brain fog is not a great feeling. I guess the question becomes which is worse feeling?

    If you would like to try again, then perhaps you would be interested in asking your insurance company for a listing of psychiatrists in your area who are participating providers. I got very dejected when I got on a different insurance which did not cover services from my therapist at the time. It felt horrible. If i could vote, I would vote that you get the medications you need to stop the sounds etc. If it were me, I would much prefer brain fog to that. If you need someone to support you and sort of hold your hand through the process, I am here. I will support you while you find someone new. But of course its all a personal decision. Sending :hug: s
     
  7. aqua

    aqua Banned Member

    Thank you for your support, thank you for taking the time to respond and offer help. no I am not committed to not taking them yet, at this moment the things I see and hear are so convincing, I know many here probably think I am crazy, but that's just how I feel like I am going crazy. to start talking about something that dosnt make any sense to anyone else, I wish I could make the sounds stop, the guilt fade the sorrow end, but it just keeps playing over and over again. thank you again Flowers I wont take up anymore of your time. thank you for hearing me.
     
  8. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    Aqua. i have known many good people who hear and see things. Its horrible for them. Just horrible. But they are good people. and they are not crazy. Although they too felt like they were going crazy. You are not crazy. And yes I understand it feels like you are going crazy. I understand that. :hug: I hope you will keep posting here. you are not taking up my time. Not at all.

    I am an old lady, lol. And so I am going to talk to you like a good mom would. I want you to get help. I want you to get the medications that will help stop the voices. This is what I want. Because I care. What would you think of calling your old psychiatrist's office and explain whats going on and asking him what he recommends you do? Would it be possible for you to do that? I am here. I am not going anywhere. And I hope you will continue to talk to me.

    Again I am going to say that I have known many people who hear and see things. As crazy as they felt. And believe me, it was driving them crazy to hear and see and feel it all, they were far from crazy. This condition can be helped. With the right medication :hug: Thats why, as an old lady mom i want to see you on something. So you are not being driven crazy with the voices etc. Just remember though. YOU are not crazy. What the voices etc are putting you through feels crazy indeed. So do you think you can reach out? I will be here for you to support you while you do that. Will you do it? :hug: :arms:
     
  9. aqua

    aqua Banned Member

    I will do it, the depression is in my way, ,y mind is feeling tormented,
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 10, 2013
  10. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    your mind is feeling tourmented. Ya I really get that. This is so much the way with these voices.... and thoughts. They do tourment. Its so hard to push through them to get the help and medication. I SO hope you can do that. Please pm me if you need support to get help. I really vote for you reaching out to a doctor and getting some good medicaiton. I knew someone here who did that. Last I heard from her she is doing much much better. They helped her so much.
     
  11. aqua

    aqua Banned Member

    i want the help i do , i tried to get more meds but its too soon, since i took an overdose and took them all, i hate these imaginary paranoid feelings, always feeling watched and laughed at , i will pm you thank you for caring,
     
  12. unfortunate soul

    unfortunate soul New Member

    I just joined this site because I am feeling the same. I feel totally alone and overwhelmed with problems. Do you think that those first attempts were "cries for help?" Does anyone besides this forum know that you have attempted suicide? I wish i had the answers for you as I know that motivations don't really help. I think what I need is to know HOW to cope with life and not feel hopeless. If we knew that we wouldn't be in this situation because surely no one wants to feel like this. I know for me that medication doesn't help. I wish love could cure things. I really do. Write back if you want. I will check back on this site to see if you did and will reply also. That's all I can say is that I relate- if that is of an consolation- and that I wish you the best of luck in finding happiness. I hope you don't commit suicide and can somehow find strength to keep going. Hugs, US
     
  13. aqua

    aqua Banned Member

    hi US, I hope you are ok, I did attempt suicide again that's why I have not responded to your post, the medications dont seem to help, I feel sedated but the thoughts are still there, I have this hopeless and empty feeling inside, nothing can help me now ,
     
  14. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    Just have to find the right pdoc to prescribe the right combination of medications that will help you. :hug: This combnation of medications are helping a bit. But not enough. And not in the right way. Please stay on them. But you deserve a better combo of medications :hug:
     
  15. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    Hi US. You wrote that you are feeling the same. Are you too hearing things? If so, I do hope you can fight to find the right medications and treatment to help you. Often the right combination is not prescribed the first time. I do hope you find the right help for your situation. No one should have to feel hopeless.
     
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