Trigger. Feedback would be nice.

Discussion in 'Poet's Corner' started by Sycotic_Sarah, Oct 14, 2007.

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  1. I'm screaming,
    so loud it's deafening,
    no one seems to be,
    listening.


    The tears are dropping,
    hiding beneath my covers,
    shutting my eyes tightly,
    pretending not to be bothered.


    Friends are leaving,
    turning into my enemies,
    screaming and yelling,
    then leaving.


    Heart shattered,
    like a million pieces of glass,
    I pick the glass up,
    and the blood begins to drop.


    Searching for the rope,
    quickly grabbing it,
    placing it around my neck,
    tightly double knotting, and sliding away.


    Eyes blood shot,
    blackness appearing,
    life fading,
    death is now nearing.


    Leaning against the wall,
    slowly falling down onto the floor,
    opening deaths door,
    I don't breathe...
    anymore...
     
  2. expressive_child

    expressive_child Well-Known Member


    I can totally relate to this and the these three verses above is my favorite in this poem! I really like the way you express your pain through words that conveys an atmosphere of hopelessness and despondency... Good write! :smile:
     
  3. WhyMeWhy

    WhyMeWhy Well-Known Member

    :eek:hmy:
    I think this is the most terrifying part of your poem.
     
  4. Why? thanks for feedback too.
     
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    I love it :D

    miss ya sarah x
     
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