*** Trigger *** OMG :o(

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by xXxRNBxXx, Apr 22, 2010.

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  1. xXxRNBxXx

    xXxRNBxXx Senior member

    Right so as some of you know I got raped by 2 men.... Well ive been TRYING to get on with my life and i aint been managing as such but ive been making progress...

    Well this morning I got another cheque... off the people that raped me.... its been about a year since i had one so i assumed they had stopped and they had paid up.... I guess not this triggered and hurt me a lot this morning.

    Anyway tonight ive been doing something stupid and its something at times i get kinda obbsessed with... i keep searching there names on facebook trying to find them....

    I have so many questions in my head that i want to ask them so much i wanna know and say im just so like ARGHHHHH... its ripping me apart....

    Luckily I havent come across them YET... but i keep searching loads and loads esp tonight....

    Am i bad for this?????? Does anyone else do this ???????????

    FFS ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh

    Im hurtingggg .... why? why ? why ? I dont want the moneyyyyyy i didnt ask for this :(
     
  2. Sa Palomera

    Sa Palomera Well-Known Member

    Rachel, honey, the facebook searching, really is not a good idea. But you know this already and I do kinda get where you're coming from :hug:

    You know I'm here to talk if you want, and in the meanwhile I'll send you some proper cyberhugs :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  3. brokenandlonely

    brokenandlonely Well-Known Member

    Rachel, I know how difficult and painful all of this really is babe but I'm here for you if you need to talk. Sending you a big :hug: :cheekkiss:
     
  4. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    Rach, I can understand wanting to have your questions answered, but will it do you any good? what if they knock you back or just give you more abuse? Would you be able to handle it?
    I'm here, if theres anything I can do I will try my best to do it
    :hug:
     
  5. xXxRNBxXx

    xXxRNBxXx Senior member

    everything you all say is right... i know it is deep down... i just i dunno *sigh* this has all flared up today because i received another cheque in post today.... x
     
  6. Remedy

    Remedy Chat & Forum Buddy

    I don't have a lot to add other than agreeing with what others have already said. But I used to search on facebook and google a lot for the person who .... me.
    You're not alone in it and if you ever need to talk I'm here. I don't think it's weird, I think in a way it's trying to get some closure.

    :hug:
     
  7. shamps

    shamps Well-Known Member

    i personally think its insult to injury paying in that way anyway......i dont think any amount of money would help me in that situation.however ive no room to say anything on the facebook scenario.granted i havent been through what you have but ive been searching for my ex on facebook but it seems hes not only deleted me but now disappeared so i was stupid enough to go as far as using another account so it didnt pick up on my name and found him that way.....just wanted to message him my hurt without seeing him face to face yet again and get some closure.what i saw picture wise and word wise was more than i bargained for and have hurt myself all over again.i really dont think you should go down that route hun,it could be too much.im very sorry for whats happened to you...chin up and dont let them grind you down:hugtackles:
     
  8. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    :Hug: :( your not bad for it hun
     
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