Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by frantic, Oct 17, 2012.

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  1. frantic

    frantic Well-Known Member

    a friend of mine called me earlier. we met about a year ago in a local psych hospital, so we have a deep understanding of each other.
    anyway, she told me she wasn't feeling good and that she's having problems with her family, especially her mom. She lives alone, and she doesn't have a car either. she told me that she had just taken (one of her meds), and when i asked her she said she couldn't promise me she wouldn't take any more. she sounded really drowsy too. i told her i was going to call an ambulance for her, because she needed to go to the ER. she didn't want to. i told her that didn't matter and that i needed her to be safe. so i told her i was going to hang up and call 911. which i did. they came and got her.
    she texted me from the er and told me that not only had she taken more of those pills after i hung up, but also that they were sending her to the worst psych hospital here in town. it's the one that i absolutely refuse to go to.

    i feel terrible now. for one, the whole overdose thing was such a huge trigger. i have od'd several times in the past, and it's still something that pops in my mind sometimes. it was her first time going to the er with an overdose.
    the other thing is, i'm responsible for her going to that awful place. i feel so bad about that. i texted her and apologized, but that doesn't help her either now.
    and of course, i'm such a huge hypocrite. how can i force someone to live when i want to die? everything i said to her is the total opposite of how i really feel right now. is that waht a true friend does? force their friend to do something they don't want to? did i have the right to do that?

    i just don't know if it was okay for me to do that.
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 18, 2012
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    You did what was right. You had no control where they took her and you did what a good friend should do...and yes, those events are very triggering...please remember,she is safe and you probably saved her...focus on that
  3. alyssaswoon

    alyssaswoon Well-Known Member

    I've been in a similar position before. I thought I had to call 911 on someone and they ended up having to stay in a psych ward overnight (and they have a fear of hospitals). I thought I was the biggest jerk ever the whole time they were gone, when he finally got back (I was staying at his place) he said he was pissed about having to be in the hospital but he appreciated the amount of concern I had for his life. I thought he was going to seriously harm or kill himself, at the time I thought it was the right thing to do, he didn't enjoy his hospital visit, but he didn't hate me for it. In fact a few hours after he thanked me.
    You were just doing what you thought needed to be done, wouldn't you expect her to do the same for you? If you hadn't called there's always a chance she could be dead now, she could be living because of you. Don't ever feel bad for doing something drastic because you care about someone, if anything they should be flattered that you care about them so much you're willing to do anything.
  4. SaraRose

    SaraRose Well-Known Member

    You did the right thing. What any good friend would have done. She was mad at you in the ER, but she will most likely be thankful for it in the long run. It may not be right now, while she still is in the state she's feeling. But it when she feels better she will be thankful for it.
  5. frantic

    frantic Well-Known Member

    Thank you!
    Feeling really really low right now. Something triggered me earlier, but I can't remember what it was.
  6. Drakenmark

    Drakenmark New Member

    What a wonderful, strong friend you are! You did the right thing, for the right reasons.
  7. frantic

    frantic Well-Known Member

    i don't feel like that though. i don't know if it was the right thing to do, how can i justify calling 911 on her, when i'm about to die? i don't have the right to force her to live and i get mad at anyone who does that to me.
    what gives me the riht to die and not her? you know what i mean?

    oh well. i guess it doesn't matter anymore now anyway. she won't have to worry about me sticking my nose into her business anymore.
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