True or False?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Wishbone, Feb 20, 2008.

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  1. Wishbone

    Wishbone Member

    Greetings. Rarely do I see a case similar to mine.
    My purpose for writing is to hopefully share my situation with an expert.
    I recently visited your website and other sites concerning Suicide Awareness and Prevention.I noticed there seems to be more attention on Teenagers and on the Elderly. Unfortunately, I fall in between. After reading
    this you may agree with me that i should kill myself.
    I am a male approaching forty five years old currently under treatment for Depression at a local clinic. My wife died suddenly in 1993 of a heart condition(Severity was concealed from me by herself & family). Our marriage lasted approx six weeks (no kids).
    Since then I feel myself eroding from the inside out.
    The articles published state that Men complete Suicide more than Women. Especially unmarried men with no kids. They may state some of the reasons, but no solutions. Could it be that this society poses undue pressures that some people cannot overcome? For instance:
    As an individual, nothing is guaranteed. However, you, as an individual are required to guarantee results
    to your Employer, guarantee payments to the bank for your car loan, guarantee payments to the bank for
    your mortgage and pay taxes. If you default, damage to your credit and reputation will occur. Can you do the same to your boss when they lay you off ? No.
    My Psychiatrist agrees with me on this, and says as unfair as it is, I need to work within this system somehow.
    But suppose I'm no longer able to ? What alternatives do I have ? Where can I go ?
    Despite what you hear, there is very little help available. Only medication and talk therapy. It does not help.
    My inner resources have been slowly eroding. Like a rock under constant running water.
    I try to meet women, but most of them give me dirty looks and if i manage to go on a date, they bum a free dinner and say they don't want to see me again.
    They say Suicide is wrong and unnecessary. But is it ? It is more than just staying alive. You have to stay alive and PRODUCE despite personal hardships. Is it political ? Maybe it is, because you pay taxes
    regardless whether you like your job or not, miserable or not.
    A hospital may be able to keep you alive, but unless you earn your own money, you end up a burden to someone else. I, for one do not want to be a burden. I don't think an agency or person wants it either.
    But if Suicide is wrong, I may not have a choice.
    In this country men in their thirties and forties are expected to help themselves. To be providers, to have solid careers, and to have answers. If one is unable to do this, he is tossed aside and forgotten.
    No one owes you a living. Why then do I owe money to live?
    We need to keep the facts in perspective. American life is a rigid society. Depression is anger turned inward. Taking your own life in Asia is considered honorable.
    Trying does not earn you anything in America, only succeeding. American government is good at punishing and collecting taxes but they do not help you.
    If one cannot conform, he or she is blamed and then ostrisized. Solve the problem by blaming the victim. True or False?
    It's frustrating that there are no solutions. Medication for the depressed is only a pacifier - An excuse so they can say there is something wrong with me -I can't cope -I can't take the pressure -I'm not employable. I know there are millions of Americans out there that feel this way. Our government wants to take everything away(Social Security, for example). If only there was a way to unite everyone out there with these problems to make some changes. Our Soldiers are out there sacrificing more than I can possibly imagine and even they are getting the royal shaft. If the problem is that there are too many people for every job then why do they make it so difficult to take your own life rather than complain? As a citizen I would like to walk in to any pharmacy and for a few dollars purchase pills for a quiet, clean, peaceful exit.
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