Trust Issues

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by isabelle.the.insomniac, Dec 19, 2008.

  1. If someone close to you (your significant other, for instance) constantly lies to you and betrays you for a long period of time, do you think it will ever be possible to truly trust them again? Do you think that once trust is broken, it will always be broken? Or do you think if you work hard enough at regaining the trust, it can be repaired in time?

    I just wanted to hear your all's thoughts on the issue. I currently have a lot of trust issues. My on again/off again ex has lied to me countless times this past year, but everytime he comes back to me and promises to change, I take him back because I see the good in him and truly believe he has good intentions. But, not anymore. We are currently trying out a friendship and seeing where it takes us. During this time, he hopes to gain my trust back.

    The thing is, I just don't know how I'm ever going to trust him again.
  2. kayla19

    kayla19 Well-Known Member

    i'm having a lot of trust issues with my fiance. he has lied to me constantly in the past about everything and lost my trust completely about 14 months ago. he knows it's a problem, knows we need to work on the trust, but continues to lie. he regularly makes promises that he's going to work on it and change, but never does. everything might be better for a week or two but he always slips back into the lies. this is the main reason why i don't think i can marry him.

    to be honest, i don't know if you can ever fully regain trust once it's lost. i think to even get back to a functional level of trust in a relationship it can take a lot of work and depending on the person who needs to do that work and how sincere they are at trying to fix what is broken, it might not even happen. not to mention i don't know how you ever really get rid of the doubt in your mind enough to believe anything the person who has lost that trust tells you.

    hope that all made sense. feel free to pm me if you want to talk about it more:smile:
  3. cinZamurai

    cinZamurai Well-Known Member


    Put the foot down now!. No you can not trust him, you know this! He is taking advantage of you and will keep on doing it as long as you let him, what ever fairytale he try to tell you.

    Work on your self esteem, its the best way to attract the kind you are looking for Isabelle :)

    Its 08:08 in the morning and I have not slept, its the reason for my bluntness, anyhow I wish you the best of luck and happiness Isabelle! :smile:.
  4. zamurai makes sense. people will continue to exploit your trust as long as you let them. the people who are worth trusting, are people that will never break that trust. its as valuable as love, maybe more so, no relationship can work without trust, theres always gonna be that nagging question and you deserve better than having to ask it again and again.

    you shouldnt have to. dont let him take advantage. if you believe someone deserves a second chance, you shouldnt give them a 3rd. people dont learn lessons unless you teach