Trying to Beat This

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Shattered Soldier, Mar 12, 2010.

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  1. Shattered Soldier

    Shattered Soldier Well-Known Member

    The suicidal thoughts have been coming at me like crazy lately. I've been exhausting myself searching for methods, having fantasies in my head, and just praying that this will all be over soon. This morning I was on the verge of taking my own life when I got on the phone with an SF member and she helped me out of it. For those of you who say the forum doesn't work, I guess you just need to find the right connections. Anyway, I was taking a drug to try lift my spirits, a prescription that I prescribed to myself. Now I cannot sleep, I'm getting constant bouts of anxiety, sometimes I can't even sit still, and feel as if I totally threw off my brain chemistry. The withdrawal effects from this medication last from 2 weeks to one month, I am near the end of week one.

    So now, I'm back on the road to trying to live again and push suicide out of my mind. Its really hard, the thoughts usually come to me in the night or when I wake up from my unrestful sleep. I just want the pain to go away. I also think it is not fair that we live in a world where there really are no sure fire methods of suicide. There is always a risk of a failed attempt and I have read that maybe only 1 in 20 die from these attempts. Very bad odds. Well, that's just the darkness of my mind speaking right now. So now I'm looking for things to do with myself and live a healthier, more fulfilling life, but nothing seems to interest me. I've lost all faith in my psychiatrist and desperately need a new one. I am really trying hard o beat this, but with my feelings blunted and with my mind always wanting to wander into a bad place it is really hard to do. Please, members, pray for me so that I can get back on my feet again and beat this terrible thing!!!

    Mike
     
  2. Wastingecho

    Wastingecho Well-Known Member

    not exactly devout, but i say a prayer for you

    have you thought of volunteering or something?
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Keep crisis number handy they care and can keep youcalm in the middle of night the will talk with you and help you to cope take care.
     
  4. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    I too will pray for you. And I will light a candle for you, sort of silly I know but maybe it will help just enough and give you just enough strength to get through this.
    It is not easy but you do not have to do it alone and I hope you know that, we are here for you and I am here for you.
     
  5. cownes

    cownes Well-Known Member

    i said a prayer for you, i hope you can find the strength to fight this, as you really are an amazing person, and mean so much to people on SF :hug: could you find a different psyc??
     
  6. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    If your psych isn't working for you then by all means find another one.. Maybe a therapist would help.. I find therapy helps more than my shrink does..She helps me clear my head of all these thoughts for a while.. Then I see her again and she helps again..I wish you luck!!
     
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