Turn a negative into a positive

Discussion in 'Positive Feelings and Motivational Messages' started by Witty_Sarcasm, May 18, 2016.

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  1. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    This may sound strange, but it seems to work for me. I will take a negative statement, such as "Friends never contact me. I will always be on my own". Then I can turn it into something more positive, like "I should reach out to friends. If I don't hear from them, I shouldn't beat myself up. I can always make new friends". I try to find ways to change something that makes me feel bad, instead of dwelling on it. That will usually just make the situation worse. I don't know if this will work for anyone else, but it may be worth a try.
  2. Rockclimbinggirl

    Rockclimbinggirl SF climber Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Good for you Witty. I will keep this concept in mind.
    Mremptyinside and Witty_Sarcasm like this.
  3. Flying Fox

    Flying Fox SF Supporter

    That is a very good thought! Everyone should take it as advice and a silver lining. It is not the end of the world it the situation doesn't turn out exactly as planned and there is more than one way of going about a problem. I will try it out as well :D.
  4. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    Thank you, I hope this helps you both and anyone else who reads this :)
    Flying Fox likes this.
  5. silis

    silis Active Member

    it is wrong to tell yourself lies. you should look logically at the situation. you shouldnt assume things are positive, that will only end up hurting you when you find out the truth.
    for instance, try to find out the reason why they dont talk to you anymore, and if they dont want to be your friends anymore, then just ignore them and cut them out of your life. everyone deserves friends that care about you and wont leave you for silly reasons.
    Lucy0 and Yoyogirl86 like this.
  6. Yoyogirl86

    Yoyogirl86 Well-Known Member

    Just cut the people out of life, set yourself a goal if they haven't bothered contacting in say 3-6 months then cut them out of your life. Say to yourself you don't need those people in your anymore, they are worth absolutely nothing to me and imagine that they a strangers to you. That's what I did to two of my friends KR and HR. They hadn't contacted me in months so I deleted them off my phonebook and blocked them from contacting me again. I thought why i should ring them and waste my time and effort, getting through to a voicemail or put up with their ott braggy attitude. So I did, okay my social contact is limited now to the occasional group (if i feel up to have emotional energy/can be bothered) but I no longer think about them and when I do, i go online chat to friends or spend time with my pen friends. I know a lot of people with mental health in my community they are absolutely fantastic and when i've seen them for a while i get little worried. However i hadn't seen KR in over a year and my reaction was like she was stranger to me. So Im starting to see difference in my life. My past friends are now in the past where they belong.
    Witty_Sarcasm likes this.
  7. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    That's good that you cut out the friends who weren't really being good friends to you. Now I only talk to the people who want to be in my life and are a positive influence, and it helps a lot.
  8. Lucy0

    Lucy0 Active Member

    Yeah, I think in some situations it works. For me I try to be realistic. Sometimes really bad things that happen are just bad. But, for things like what you are talking about that definitely can help!
    Witty_Sarcasm likes this.
  9. Huw

    Huw Well-Known Member

    I've discovered people tend to consider negative as anything that opposes their ideals, their ideas or whatever they want to do. Because it's their ideal or idea it must be positive.

    I was at a conference a few years ago at which I gave an opposing view, on three occasions, to that which the speaker was promoting. She accused me of being negative, but I wasn't, I was just disagreeing with her view point.

    When we judge between right and wrong it's a simple matter of judging between opposites, but negative and positive, although opposites, are both useful and must be judged differently.

    A positive can be either true or false as can a negative and each can only be judged within itself. Telling someone they are going to recover from a serious illness is positive, but if its untrue it isn’t negative, it’s a positive false.

    Play with this for a few days and you’ll discover negative is as useful as positive. And you won’t ever feel a sting in the accusation “you’re negative” again.
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