MADOFF!! How does the world's currently most hated man survive in prison? You'd be surprised. How does a sophisticated Hebraic white collar criminal cope amongst robbing, raping, drugging, mugging, molesting, blue collar thugs? You learn. Mr. Bernie Madoff endures the two week introductory phase of his 150 year sentence as inmates welcome him with punches, kicks, slashes, angry erections, urine and feces. Over time, he gradually finds the redeeming qualities in others - and himself. Cursing his situation, he puts himself back on the road to repaying humanity, but it takes baby steps. Bernie offers to tie a correction officer's shoes. Bernie gives a stray carrot to a psychotic inmate. Things always get a little fuzzy and warm during the middle of each episode, which makes you think that prison's not such a bad place. But five minutes from the end of every show, a buzzer sounds, Bernie's head gets smashed in, and in Waltons' style, an inmate or guard announces: Say goodnight Bernie, you *&&*(#@%!$^#)@^@% . And this is to remind you that prison is, indeed, an evil place. Tonight's pilot episode entitled White Collar Beatdown stars Ice Cube and Danny Treja. Hear Bernie scream, "Even financiers have souls!"