Ug....just another day in life

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by blackfire, Oct 27, 2006.

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  1. blackfire

    blackfire Well-Known Member

    It is 5:34 AM. I have not slept in days. My body and mind are worn out and can't take anymore. I made it through a tough week at college. It was midsemester exams. I go to a small tech school an hour from home. i live on my own and like the independence. It is however hard to make friends and find stuff to keep busy. i don't work because my college schedule doesn't permit it. I don't want to go to school to be an auto technician anymore. But I never commit to a major and this upsets the parents. I have been going to college for three years. I am just fed up with it all.

    I can't seem to make any new friends and the old friends I had have all gone away. Over time I have lost touch with them or I call them and they are always too busy. The last four years have been extremely lonely for me and it has eaten away at me.

    I came home for the weekend and my parents asked if I was ok. i said ya, that I was just tired. Which I was tired, but I was also very emotional and lost. I thought driving home would help, that my hometown would help heal my pain. I have been so hurt in the last year that my heart can't take anymore. Between having"so called friends" and an ex-girlfriend that told me I was no good (her mother took her side) and just made my life hell. This winter seems like a good time to hang it up and call it good.
     
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