Ugh

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Domo, Jun 15, 2010.

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  1. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    I can't stand the vulnerability of posting here but i am so god damned lost in this that i don't know what else to do.

    No one can understand that as long as i am attached to anyone, i will not be well. But if i am alone, wel that doesn't work either. You can't medicate that. Therapy; i trust the process but i am running out of time. The damage i am doing in the meaning time is irreparable.

    I can't do this for much longer. I am getting so paranoid and destroying everything.

    What am i supposed to do?

    I can't stand this. I am driving myself mad.
     
  2. Mikeintx

    Mikeintx Well-Known Member

  3. skyla

    skyla Member

    Hi Domo

    I am new to this forum and reading your post really affected me cause I am going through similar problems...I have split up with someone and have realised that I struggle to live with but cant live without people in my life. I am really suffering. Have no clue how to get through this at the moment but am hoping that something will shift eventually. Are you feeling any better? x
     
  4. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    *holds* I'm sorry Bec
     
  5. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    No, not feeling any better. It's a whole lot worse and i gave in a cut up my arm last night.

    Don't wait for something to shift, you could be waititng your whole life.

    I see my psychiatrist this morning and if something doesn't change, i am not sure what i am going to do. I am getting closer to breaking point.
     
  6. skyla

    skyla Member

    Domo....thanks for replying to my post....im so sorry you didnt end up feeling better..im concerned that you cut you arm..are you ok? Stay in touch if nothing else.
     
  7. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    I'm feeling a bit better now.

    My moods change contantly, i just have to remember that when i am suicidal, the feeling won't last forever. I just have to ride it out.

    My doctor upped my meds so hopefully i'll see a difference there.

    How are you doing?
     
  8. skyla

    skyla Member

    So glad you are feeling a bit better...ive had a tough day but have had many many worse ones before so that is a blessing..I know what you mean about moods...I have Bipolar Type 2 which means my moods can be variable...im glad you got through your emotions..well done x
     
  9. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Can you tell me a little bit about yourself in regards to your bipolar? Such as how often your mood fuctuates, do you get hypomanic often or is it more switching between 'normal' to depressed?
     
  10. skyla

    skyla Member

    Hi Domo....hope you are well

    my Bipolar switches from mania to depression almost on a seasonal basis and usually at roundabout the same times every year..both moods are extremely debilitating because both crush me in their own way. I obviously prefer the mania to the depression but it can be just as devastating for different reasons. My depressive episodes can last from a month to anything up to 6 months. The mania is usually between 3 and 4 months and follows it is normally a period of exhaustion, collapsing into a heap on the floor and then the depression sets in...closely followed by suicidal tendencies. This can go on for 6 months, less if im lucky and then I start the cycle all over again.

    Have you experienced anything similar?

    xx
     
  11. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Hrmm that sounds intense.

    No, i have never been manic before. I have been hypomanic about twice.

    My moods change much more often then that. Like on an hourly basis i am not sure how i am going to feel.

    Are you on meds and in therapy?
     
  12. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    just wanted to give you both a big :arms:
     
  13. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    :mhmm: Thank you Bambi.
     
  14. skyla

    skyla Member

    Hi Domo,

    I have been yes, many many times...ive had alot of occasions where I tend to improve on my own..sometimes meds can bring a depressive episode on and other times, coming of meds brings a manic episode on..im a very complicated soul sometimes...: )

    Hows you today?
     
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