Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by ~Claire, Jan 16, 2010.

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  1. ~Claire

    ~Claire Well-Known Member

    I hate starting a post about me. It makes me so anxious, so uncomfortable. But I need to write somewhere other than my diary. I'm posting here because I'm not in crisis just uncertain.

    These past few weeks I have really been struggling. Trying to keep that mask in place is becoming increasingly difficult. I get so frustrated with myself, I've tried my hardest to get over this depression & these suicidal feelings but the relief is only ever short lived.

    This time last year I hit rock bottom & I can feel myself sliding to how I was then. I can't go back to being like that again. I'd rather end it now. I am stuck & the only way out for me is suicide.

    I had so many things I wanted to write here but I'm struggling to get the words out now, like I've hit a mental block :argh:. I'm so stupid sometimes, it's taken ages to write just a few lines, but opening up is something I'm really not good at.

    Anyways, thanks for reading, no replies needed but hugs are welcome...I could do with them :blub:.
  2. yorkie bar

    yorkie bar Well-Known Member

    I would send you a hug, but i still can't get my hugs to work

    Big hug anyway

  3. Sending loads of hugs,keep talking Calire x
  4. Rukia

    Rukia Well-Known Member

  5. kurenai

    kurenai Well-Known Member


  6. Tam

    Tam Well-Known Member

    Well now you've been brave enough to post, do you think you could find the courage to keep talking? Is there something specific happening that is bringing you down? Anything you feel you could tell us about? If you don't feel up to posting here, maybe you could write a pm? I'd like to know what's going on for you (even if you did stop me from poking the presents at Christmas lol)

    And here's a hug :hug: and :console:
  7. ~Claire

    ~Claire Well-Known Member

    Thanks guys, but I'm done. I just need to bide my time for a little while & that's me. I'm not strong enough to fight for survival & to be honest I don't really want to either. I just want to go.

  8. Tam

    Tam Well-Known Member

    Hang in there Claire, you've got friends here who'll help, don't give up. :hug:
  9. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    you came here that in itself shows you have some fight left. It is hard as i know the feeling of just surrendering to it all. Call someone okay talk to someone anyone and get re focused Feel the dam pain quit hiding it get angry get mad then move on get fighting and stay fighting.
  10. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hi Claire,
    I hope you know you are loved by so many.. I don't want anything to happen to you.. You mean alot to me..You are one of my best friends and you deserve better..Keep talking to me.. Love You, Dad
  11. ~Claire

    ~Claire Well-Known Member


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