Uncertain

Hello

So I almost certainly have some type of underlying disorder to go with depression and bulimia. And a lot of words are being slung about, mainly due to three things:

1) Black and white thinking, and I mean to a hysterical level. I don't feel unless I "allow" myself to rationalise so much as having emotion, I have panic attacks when I don't know or understand things, whenever there are things that are uncertain. It's damaging a lot of things in my life, as you imagine.

2) Don't know how to explain this... but people, in my head, who I talk to. They are friends, they take over action when I can't cope with things. I don't think it's DID as I'm very aware of them, and "switches" happen easily barring a touch of disorientation. I've lost time in the past too... But I don't buy that it's DID, it doesn't make sense to me!

3) I have no identity. I don't know who I am.

Hope that makes some sense, and somebody may have something they could advice? Add into that an ability to form relationships, intense paranoia about absolutely everything, mood swings which snap from amicable to suicidal to manic in a matter of seconds (from hours to days in length) and, obviously, a constant consideration on how, when and if I can kill myself efficiently.

Thanks for reading. Lex.

 

It does sound liek DID to me, people with DID can be aware of teh other people living with them. and some of the people inside one arent aware. it happens.
And black and white thinking and not knowing who YOU are are signs of this also.
I'm not saying this is set in stone or i am a qualified anything. just from what you said, it sounds right,
Talk to your therapist and or psychologist about this.