Unconquerable Worthlessness

Wrick Malcof

Well-Known Member
#1
So I have to be at work in a little over two hours (as of this post). I want to call in sick. I slept very little last night, and I'm overcome with a dreadful feeling of worthlessness. I barely even feel like standing. But the way I feel is unacceptable in today's day. My boss requires that I suck it up and white-knuckle through another 9 hours. Even though my work output will be drastically less, I have to go in because it's "responsible." So I'm forced to decide between feeling like shit all day, or feeling like shit who sucks at his job all day. The worst part is there is almost no real world sympathy for a person in my position. Young and strong male living at home. A lot of people believe I have no excuses for the way I feel. I can't call in saying "hey I'm not coming in because I can't bear existing for today." I'll get fired, and then possibly have other employers informed of my "habits." It's starting to feel like I have to make a choice between being employable and being okay.
 

sadhart

SF Supporter
#2
So I have to be at work in a little over two hours (as of this post). I want to call in sick. I slept very little last night, and I'm overcome with a dreadful feeling of worthlessness. I barely even feel like standing. But the way I feel is unacceptable in today's day. My boss requires that I suck it up and white-knuckle through another 9 hours. Even though my work output will be drastically less, I have to go in because it's "responsible." So I'm forced to decide between feeling like shit all day, or feeling like shit who sucks at his job all day. The worst part is there is almost no real world sympathy for a person in my position. Young and strong male living at home. A lot of people believe I have no excuses for the way I feel. I can't call in saying "hey I'm not coming in because I can't bear existing for today." I'll get fired, and then possibly have other employers informed of my "habits." It's starting to feel like I have to make a choice between being employable and being okay.


I'm sorry about the way that you're feeling. I can relate to wanting to not go to work, but doing so despite feeling bad. Would it be possible to ask for a day off like say in a week or so? I guess the point of doing that would be to plan a day for just yourself. Sorry as I know that may not be an option or a helpful suggestion. But I hope that you are able to keep pushing forward and that things will get better for you.
 

Petal

~*Mod Extraordinaire*~
Staff Alumni
SF Supporter
#3
Hi there, i'm so sorry for the way you are feeling, how did your day work out? Did you go to work?

I don't know if you are in treatment for depression but it sounds like it might be a reasonable idea to get into it.

I care and I sympathise with you.
 

Wrick Malcof

Well-Known Member
#4
Thanks for reading. I never expect it, so i always appreciate it. In regards to having a day off, I typically try not to spend them alone or on myself. But that tends to mean exhausting myself with friends or family. I don't tire of them, I just tire out easily from a mental perspective. Especially when I feel like I'm putting on a charade most of the time.

I did go to work, and floated through the day doing the bare minimum. As I'm about to do now.

Thanks again for reading and responding.
 

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