I have been trying hard for a year and nothing in my life changes or improves. Though I have a method neatly planned out I'm afraid I might get a sudden rush of despair and throw myself off some high place. Tried so hard, gave my best, while the mediocres and insentitive bastards thrive. I don't even have anything to say anymore. My fate now lies in the hands of Providence, see if she decides to give me a break. If not, better at 27 than at 80, I suppose.