UndeddMonkey (Abort Retry Fail)

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by UndeddMonkey, Jan 25, 2009.

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  1. UndeddMonkey

    UndeddMonkey Member

    UndeddMonkey here,
    Dunno what to do now. Maybe read some things in the forums here or dare to taste a glass of what's in those bottles down in the basement of the old house. I suppose anything would be better than what I've always thought of as relief. I'm not into wine tasting though and I'm not much for drinking either. It's not like I don't have a cocktail sometimes before dinner but I think I wouldn't know how understand the basement.
    I've attempted suicide a number of times. I've since regarded professional advice as tripe (slowly). I've watched my siblings willfully kill themselves and witnessed close friends make the same decisions.
    Things have gotten far worse for me now. I always considered suicide cheating but I can't imagine a more torturous hell than what I experience. I'm not religious but I don't want the people who love me to have to suffer any more than they already do.
    I am not religious and I don't mind religion. I do keep a gun because I -
    I think I am going to need it at the end.
  2. porcelain child

    porcelain child Well-Known Member

    Welcome to the forum... i am new too..

    I am sorry things are tough.. but remember suicide is never the answer...

    I am here if you wanna talk..

  3. Izziebabystar

    Izziebabystar Well-Known Member

    hey babe
    welcome to the site
    hope you feel at home
    im izzie
    if you need anything feel free to mail me
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Welcome to sf hun :)
  5. soliloquise

    soliloquise Well-Known Member

    welcome monkey .. i hope you find some help here xx
  6. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    :welcome: to SF. I am sorry you find yoursel at this place. I hope through support, things will change for the better.
  7. mdmefontaine

    mdmefontaine Antiquities Friend

    hi. glad you are here. i hope things get better for you. . . . . it is very positive that you are reaching out.

    you can pm anytime you want to talk - and, here at s.f. there is always someone around to connect with :hug:
  8. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    Welcome to the forums.
  9. UndeddMonkey

    UndeddMonkey Member

    Thank you all. Your consideration and support gives me strength. A little hope even or maybe solace, however dreadful and foreign that still is to me it's nice to find my being has not yet been stripped of these things, I thought it had been. Today I was actually bothered to do something I wouldn't and the results were positive. I can't even remember the last time that happened like that for me. I know it has before but it's been soo long since and the things in my life have removed any ability I might have once had to relate to them. I've been going through life for so long feeling like less than myself - the most important bits and pieces of my being being taken from me as a consequence of me doing what I believe in. I feel like I got piece of myself back today.
  10. ~Claire

    ~Claire Well-Known Member

    Welcome to SF Undedd Monkey.

    Take care, Claire xx
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