Wow have I been there! Too many times. Then I proceeded to really screw the pooch by completely confobulating my relationships with girls that did love and I did love them. You're not alone on that road!
Dave303, do you ever wonder whether you can find someone else whom you feel as strongly about? I feel that my chances of finding love are flushed down the toilet as soon as this person got married and moved on with somebody else.
I tried moving on about 10 years ago, but lately, these issues have come back. I do not suffer from a low self-esteem as people tell me that I am very physically attractive (I'm a bodybuilder). The real problem is not being able to meet other people; it's falling in love in the same way that I felt for this other person.
...and...though she's moved on...several times past me...i can't shake the feeling and belief that one day she'll show up on my front stoop in pouring rain with a lone suitcase as her cab pulls away from the curb.
...that may just be Hollywood sentiments..but....
..it seems that i'm the only one missing her and everything we had...
and try as i do to fight it...i think that for a long time she is the only one i will ever really *really* love...
mmmmm...I know that awful feeling. There are days when, even though she's been out of my life for a long time, I do a double-take everytime I pass someone on the street that looks like her. It hurts like nothing else and the only thing that helps at all is waiting so that time can put enough objects, new loves and mundane miseries, between you and those moments in which that person was all you ever had.
Thanks, guys....I'm so glad that you can relate to what I'm going through.
I'm caught between two decisions:
1. Kill myself and put an end to all of my misery. The thought of this person being around somewhere and not being with them is like Hell on Earth; OR
2. Live out the rest of my life in misery and fight on. All of our lives go by pretty quickly anyway, don't they? When you put work, stress and not having enough free time for anything into the equation, it seems like natural death is not that far away when putting everything into a proper context.
Regarding option 2 above, it is a case of wanting my natural life to go by as quickly as possible so that it can be over and done with.
By the way, does anyone know that song 'Suicide Is Painless' by Johnny Mandel? It is the theme song to the television sitcom series 'M.A.S.H.'.....I have been listening to this song quite frequently on my iPod of late....
Isn't there a phrase that goes something like "you only get one shot at true love"?
Unrequited Love must be incredibly painful. The most unrequited form of affection I've ever experienced, were the occasional crushes, which I kept secret and would let subside after a few months. I guess I can consider myself fortunate in the regard that I've never interacted with someone that would result in me falling head over heels in Love with, only to realize that I may be treading in potential "friendzone" territory. The whole concept of Love is truly a draining, and depressing thing for me to dwell on, I may never experience it...and by the posts in this thread and the pain you all are going through because of it...well...makes me not want any of that. I hurt enough as is, Love will only push me over the edge.
If we only get one shot at true love, then I've had my shot and missed the mark big time. Life feels SO barren and void without having someone to love. It's like living and walking in a never ending barren wasteland.
I have tried to move on with other people without success. It's not a matter of not being able to land someone; it's just that nobody else seems to make me feel the same way as that other person did. The subsequent relationships that I have had felt contrived.....put on to fill a void in my life rather than a positive outlet for me. In the end, I just stopped having relationships altogether. You know the old saying, "being with somebody just for the sake of easing loneliness makes one even more lonely".
My life is one of sorrow and constant emotional struggle...
Not liking that one shot thing... i was in love with a girl who loved me back, made me happy when i thought i never would be, problem is we split up to go to uni, long distance thing. Then she gets with someone else in like a week... hurts like hell still and makes me sad to know she won't feel anything like this for me, basically she's probably trivalised our whole relationship by finding someone else so soon. So I doubt she'll ever really remember how much she loved me by how much loosing me hurts or possibly she never loved me at all. Who knows... I just know after experienceing all those good times with her this lonelyness is so unbearable... so cold.. so alone... I really wish we could just turn our feelings off sometimes, i do try.
Yes, I've felt like this, and I still do. My story is pretty pathetic, though. I had a friend (female) that I had a complete and total crush on. I never told her how I felt. I haven't even seen her for 10 years, yet I still think about her all the time.