Unsure about my sexual orientation

Discussion in 'LGBTQIA (New Forum)' started by Obsonet, Oct 14, 2016.

  1. Obsonet

    Obsonet Active Member

    So maybe I should start this by saying I have had no sexual experience of any kind, maybe that will help understand why I am confused.

    I guess I thought for a while that I would just go on with my life and if I met someone then I could see what I was interested in, but now part of me thinks I should know what I like at this point since everyone else I know does.
    I haven't told anyone about me feeling this way because I didn't think it mattered, I would tell people about it if I was in a relationship but it's just bugging me more recently.

    I don't know, was just looking for advice maybe on what I should do if this is bothering me?
     
  2. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Welcome to the forum. I am sorry to hear that you are hurting and feeling aniexty. Ok, you may suffer from confidence issues when it comes to meeting the opposite sex but that comes down to learning from experience.

    Have spoken to a therapist about your issues or perhaps speaking to a sexual therapist about the issue. In time, you will meet someone but it takes time. Have your about using dating sites by uploading a picture and a brief profile. It's only a suggestion in order to help you to meet people and form a relationship.

    I understand it's hard but everyone has to start somewhere. I hope it helps but we care about YOU. Keep posting my friend as YOU are important.
     
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  3. Obsonet

    Obsonet Active Member

    I think I'm not really ready for a relationship right now, but I can't really figure out how I feel sometimes.
    It's just I'm not sure if I'm straight/bi/pan and it's just confusing to me.
     
  4. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Go and see a therapist to discuss your feelings, it will only help to know your true feelings. I know it's hard but get an understanding first before forming relationship.
     
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  5. Obsonet

    Obsonet Active Member

    Yeah, maybe you are right. Thanks, unknown.
     
  6. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Your welcome.
     
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  7. cren

    cren Well-Known Member

    hey.. how are you?? i'm not sure if you can remember me.. i'm that weird girl from the chat room.. anyway.. if it helps any.. i think what you should do is think back on people you've met.. even when you were a child.. i started to think that i might be gay because when i look back.. i realized that i only ever liked girls.. i had girl crushes even as a child.. then i realized as i grew older i only check out girls and do not bother to look at guys.. so i thought.. yeah.. i probably am a lesbian.. but then i met a guy.. who made me realize that i'm capable of liking and loving guys after all.. so i realized i'm bisexual..

    sexuality is fluid.. you can explore it and discover what your sexuality really is.. if you're not comfortable on telling anyone about you questioning it.. then you don't need to.. but don't be worried if you think you're this and after awhile you think you belong to another one.. labels.. are just that.. you don't need to be confined by a label.. you're a person after all.. as they say labels are for cans not people..

    i think it will help if you join a forum or a site that i for LGBT.. it might help.. there are tons online.. just choose one that is perfect for you..
     
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  8. Obsonet

    Obsonet Active Member

    Yes if course I remember you cren, although I wouldn't say you are weird. I hope you are doing okay

    I guess looking back I have had crushes on guys and girls. I never really paid much attention to the guy crushes just tried to ignore them, but looking back I guess its a bit more obvious.

    Anyway you are right about labels, I will just see what happens and who I go out with.

    But yeah lgbtq forum m8ght be a good idea.

    Thank you for your advice cren, hope you are feeling better.
     
  9. cren

    cren Well-Known Member

    i think it's normal to ignore homosexual feelings as a kid.. because we think that it's not "normal".. especially if the only influences you have are heterosexual.. just try to meet people from both genders and see how you react and feel..
     
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  10. Obsonet

    Obsonet Active Member

    Yeah thats a good plan I think.

    Still got to work on somd other things. I doubt much of this matters too much, i think I am a bit too ugly for a bf or gf
     
  11. cren

    cren Well-Known Member

    why would you say that.. no one is too ugly.. to be in a relationship.. what matters is that you don't end up like an asshole like me.. who hurts people that loves me..
     
  12. Obsonet

    Obsonet Active Member

    Well ive never recieved any kind of affection from anyone in that way.
    I think it is because I am just very ugly.
    I cant change ut so I try not to let it bother me a ton

    And im sure thats not true cren, i dont think you set out to hurt anyone.
     
  13. cren

    cren Well-Known Member

    you just haven't found the right person yet.. he/she will come.. no worries..

    oh.. i think i'm stupid.. and too insecure.. and i always hurt people around me.. and i think i've done it too much now.. and it's all because of my stupidity..
     
  14. Obsonet

    Obsonet Active Member

    People my age have normally met someone. Maybe I am just meant to be alone all my life.

    Cren you aren't stupid. Realtionships are tough. Being insecure is somethibg you can work on.
     
  15. cren

    cren Well-Known Member

    how old are you?? if you don't mind me asking.. to be honest everyone is asking me why i'm not yet married until now.. hahaha..

    it's ok.. no worries.. i'll try to figure things out.. besides i'm not ready to give up on him..
     
  16. Obsonet

    Obsonet Active Member

    I am 20.

    Thats great cren hopefully you will be happy soon
     
  17. cren

    cren Well-Known Member

    you're still young.. don't worry too much.. you'll find someone soon.. you're probably still outgrowing your awkward teenage phase.. and that happens sometimes.. there's nothing wrong with you..

    yeah.. i do hope so.. thanks..
     
  18. Obsonet

    Obsonet Active Member

    Most 20 year olds arent virgins. I think it will ve unlikely I will find someone but I will try. Never know I guess
     
  19. cren

    cren Well-Known Member

    just because you're not as sex crazed as others doesn't mean there's something wrong with you..
     
  20. BarryW

    BarryW Well-Known Member

    Obsonet, people's desire for close emotional or physical relationships with others can kick in at different ages (or maybe never). I can't tell from your posts whether you have been wanting to date and haven't found someone, or haven't had much desire to date. Either way, there's no need to worry about being 'left behind' as a 20 yr old virgin. I can understand a bit of your feelings since I lost my virginity with the opposite sex at 23. I haven't dated anyone for 10 years after and haven't really wanted to. Sometimes I wonder if I can call myself straight -- maybe more accurate is 'asexual' or 'not sexual'. Cren has good advice, don't worry about fitting into society's cookie cutter labels.