Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by swimmergirl, Mar 30, 2010.

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  1. swimmergirl

    swimmergirl Well-Known Member

    So, I started cutting again on sunday and told my therapist/doc yesterday...he was not happy about it, naturally. He proceeded to call my entire treatment team and tell them, which was mortifying enough. But then he made me promise not to cut myself and to call him when I want to do it, otherwise if I keep cutting, he thinks I need to be in the hospital, and am not treatable on an outpatient basis....this seems a little extreme to me....thoughts??

    And, I really want to cut still, but dont want to call him because I am worried that he will stick me in the hospital...so I might just cut and break my promise, which is a shitty thing to do...fuck.
  2. Wastingecho

    Wastingecho Well-Known Member

    if you don't want to call him, post here and talk to us instead

    just missed you on messenger (again) {sigh}

    i think he is very concerned about you and if you have a treatment team they need to be up-to-speed in case you go to one of them

    i also think if you can work up the courage to talk to the doctor when you feel like hurting yourself, he would feel much better about treating you on an outpatient basis

  3. JustSam

    JustSam Well-Known Member

    I agree about the calling thing.
    If you call him, when you feel like doing it, he'll be more likely to keep you on an outpatient treatment thing, and to trust you.
    I would think the point he is getting at is that you can't be alone in your hurt and all. That's why he wants you to reach out, and if you won't do it by your own choice, then he can't allow you to continue bottling it up and harming yourself.
    But yeah you could always post here too, just as a way of letting things out.

    It's awesome that you told him in the first place btw.
    I'd never be able to do that.
    Let alone go to therapy.
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 31, 2010
  4. swimmergirl

    swimmergirl Well-Known Member

    I totally fucked up tonight. I am so worthless. Why do I keep making the same mistakes over nad over? I am going to keep cutting because I dont know what else to do now. Its 3am and I am lost, and hurt. Why did I go over there? I am such a *****. I hate myself. I hate me. i wish i was dead.
  5. Wastingecho

    Wastingecho Well-Known Member

    i'm so sorry, hon

    please don't hate yourself, hate the situation

    the world needs you, the students need you, you have a noble purpose

    if one of us should still be here, is has to be you

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