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Upset About Turning Twenty-One, All Because...

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I was excited, up until 10 minutes ago. I think I'm letting this bother me a bit too much, I don't really know?

My boyfriend's boss won't let him have off for my twenty-first birthday [Dec. 9th]. All week we have been talking about what we are going to do & I had my "big day" all planned out. I just feel like everything is ruined now. He has the day after my birthday off, but that doesn't help much. I have a friend's baby shower to attend, which is girl's only & we booked our hotel in Atlantic City for Saturday, the day of my actual birthday. We can't cancel because it's non-refundable. It cost quite a bit, too.

My best friend shares my birthday. She's the one that brought my boyfriend & me together by introducing us. So she's a good friend to the both of us. She's booked a hotel in A.C., too. We had huge plans to party together. She'll be bringing her boyfriend. It was supposed to be the four of us. Now, seeing as I might be going up without my boyfriend til midnight [the time he'll be there after he gets out of work & gets ready] I feel like I'm going to be a third wheel. My friend keeps talking about how she gets really sexual after a few drinks - translating into: she'll be all over him, while I attempt to hang with her. I don't mind that at all, but I'm going to feel so alone.

I'm sure to some extent I am being a bit selfish, but at the same time - I've been waiting for this birthday for a long time. I'm trying my hardest not to be angry or upset with my boyfriend because I know it's not his fault, but it's difficult for me to hide how depressed I am about it. I was so happy all week & all of today, but now I just feel like, "Oh. This birthday is going to suck." I've never had a birthday celebration before; No Sweet 16 and so on. I was really looking forward to turning 21-yr's on Saturday. Now, I could careless if my birthday came or went.

I'm sorry if this post upsets anybody. I don't want people to think I'm being a bitch or w/e. I'm just really upset right now. I needed to vent a little. Thanks.

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