I feel so sick. My eyeballs hurt but I'm not tired, yet I'm extremely tired. I feel like I'm gonna throw up and I can barely breathe. I've been sitting here, in my room, all damn day once again and I'm so sick of it. I'm so sick of my life. This life isn't much of one at all. I have no friends and the friends I semi-have that live around here I blow them off all the time. I just wanna see my boyfirend but he's working.. once again. He's always working. I love him yet I hate him. He's there for me but he's not. My sister went over her friends house again. I sit here day after day after day online. I wake up, shower, eat a little something, get online, the day goes by, I eat dinner, stay online some more, go to sleep then wake up and do it all over again the very next day. I'm so sick and tired of this life I have. I cry so much. Maybe that's why my eyeballs are burning and stinging. I don't know. I need to move away from here, I need my own place. I'm sick of living in this small-ass little town. I love my family but I'm sick of living with them. I need my own life, I need a job, I need a car, I need a license, I need stupid money. Omg I hate money. To make money you have to have money. It's so horrible. My family is so poor to begin with.. our truck still needs to be fixed and inspected (it's our only vehicle), I need to go to the gyno this month but I don't have health insurance. This life is so messed up and I don't know how much longer I can handle it. It's been this way since I was in middle school and it's only gotten worse and worse. I need to get out of here, I need to leave.