I have been doing well the past six months keeping away from SI. Now though I am finding those urges beginning again. The past nine months have been some of the most difficult I have had for some time (my father got sick and died in March). The difficulties are more to do with my family (mother and sisters) than with grieving. So many old family problems came up. The aftereffects of the difficulties are pushing me towards SI. The easiest thing for me to do would be to SI, but that would also require my telling my T and Pdoc about it. Also I do not want to end this streak. I began SI again four years ago after 26 years of not doing it. Now I am close to saying it has ended, but the urges are back. I need some support from people who understand. My resistance is weakening.