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Used, Abused, and Confused

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Insignificant, Oct 7, 2008.

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  1. Insignificant

    Insignificant Account Closed

    i'm about to break. i have been under so much stress it almost seems unreal. i'm also trying to stay out of the hospital, but i'm afraid my time is almost done.

    about four weeks ago some "friends" of mine came over and they stayed. i thought they were going to stay for about a week, and that i was totally fine with. well, one week turned into two and two to three and so on. these "friends" have been doing nothing really to help. oh they clean up their messes but now they're helping themselves to anything in my house. at one point and time they would ask now not. they gave me $20 two weeks ago and $10 for gas which he used all of. they have also brought drugs into my home as well as drug dealers. i'm not down with that i have my son in the house too.

    i know the answer seems real simple just throw them out. well, it's easier said than done for me. i'm such a softie i don't want to hurt anyone in the process even though this whole situation has so nearly landed me in the hospital. i wish there was a way i could do this without seeming mean.

    this is not the only situation. there is another lady i know who asked me to come get her out of the hospital at 4am and i did it. then i helped get her to a safe house but she didn't have a place for all of her stouf and they only allowed for three bags at that place so now i have all of her stouf in the back of my car. i've asked her when she was going to get this or when we can do something with it but she won't say. she calls but she can't say.

    i have also been asked for rides and go to court with someone and come into work on my days off and cover shifts. i can't handle all this anymore, but at the same time i want to be able to help. i just don't know what to do anymore. i know i need to take care of myself whatever that means. i'm not like everyone who would be so bold as to tell someone off. i just am about to break and i'm not sure how to handle all of this anymore. any suggestions would be appreciated right now.

    thanks for taking the time to read this and respond to it.
  2. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Liz, maybe you could write how you are feeling and explain to those "friends" that the party is over. It is time for them to find new accomodations. They are putting you and your son at risk. I understand that you do not want to hurt them, but your son needs to come first. You wish to help others, but you will be unable to if your own mental wellbeing is compromised. Set boundaries for yourself and then don't go beyond them.
  3. Insignificant

    Insignificant Account Closed

    thanks for taking the time to respond corrina. i want to let you know this morning at 5am i told them to get out of my house. i have asked them kindly to not bring drugs back into my house and yet last nite they did it again, and were planning on it again at 4 this morning. i don't know how i did it. all i know is it was a complete and total miracle that i said that. now the hardest part is going to be sticking to it because they are still asking for my help even though they are out of my house. i wish this crap wasn't so hard.
  4. bluet

    bluet Member

    I completely understand what you felt. I have been through thise hard times when I have to keep a smile on my face and stay strong, but we have to see the priority here. Sometimes we just have to hang on and stand our ground.
  5. patacake

    patacake Well-Known Member

    well done sweetheart u neededto be strong to make that stand for u and ur child , there are times in life hun when even for us softies enough is enough , you did the right thing , sounds like u could do with a listening ear , mines around on the forum pm me if u like .


    Jo xx
  6. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Congratulations Insignificant. I know that it was hard, but you did the right thing. I knew you could do it. :smile: Those freeloading, drug addicts have to find a place of their own. Dont let them back into your home. They have overstayed their welcome and turned your house into a crackhouse. If the police were to find drugs at your home, then you could get arrested. Once again, good job for throwing them out. :hug:
  7. famous.last.words

    famous.last.words Forum Buddy

    you have been so strong putting your foot down and controlling this situation. These people have been using you and you and your son dont deserve that.

    Please try and keep strong. If you need a friend, im always here to listen :hug:
  8. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    You did the right thing by booting them because the next thing would be them steeling from you to support there drug habit. When they ask for your help again just repond so politely by saying OOOHHH HELL NOOOO!!!! You used me once that is all you get. Find someone else to freeload off of...Stay Strong. You took the first step now stick to your guns. As far as the lady who left her stuff in your car I would call her and tell her that her stuff will be on the sidewalk outside of thecenter she is in as such an such time. Then it is on her not you!!! Once that has been taking care of take a couple of days off work andlock the doors and enjoy a little peace and quiet!! Take Care!!~Joseph~
  9. Insignificant

    Insignificant Account Closed

    thanks for all your replies. i have stuck to my guns and they have been out for a few days now and thank gawd. as far as the other lady is concerned she is suppose to be coming to my place today to come get her stouf.

    now i've got another friend pleading for my help, but he is absolute panic mode and won't slow down for anything. i try to tell him to calm down and he says he is calm when his feet and legs are moving rapidly. his panic mode has begun to drag me down. i finally dropped him off at his house and told him to call me when he calms down. gawd i hate being so mean but whatelse am i suppose to do?
  10. PeaceBlueFire

    PeaceBlueFire Well-Known Member

    I know you probably feel really mean and aweful lately because of these various other people in your life asking for help. You have to understand that there comes a time in everyone's life where you have to take care of yourself first before all else. Well, yourself and your family. I am continously being told that I have to forgo helping everyone like I always do and take care of myself or I will always be sick. It's hard to do and I am still struggling in these regards. Please take care of yourself and your son and stay safe. Erin :)
  11. Insignificant

    Insignificant Account Closed

    this friend of mine that was in panic mode a few days ago is still in panic mode. not only that but if i'm not continually doing something with him he is trying to lay guilt trips on me left and right. he's telling me he shouldn't even be alive. mind you he's not telling me he is going to kill himself just that he feels he shouldn't even be on this earth. he did ask me what i would do if he told me just how much of each med he had and had alcohol to put it down with kind of thing. this guy is so wound up it's driving me crazy. he called me at my job about 8 times today, and then at the end of my day he showed up at my job. what should i be doing about this guy?
  12. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Maybe he belongs in a mental hospital?
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