Useless and alone

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Kelsi, Jan 23, 2010.

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  1. Kelsi

    Kelsi Account Closed

    Im no good at expressing pain. I just hurt all over on the inside. Ive been out of work for way too long, cant get into school because I made to much money. I know I sound whiney, I get that. It just feels like the world, my life, my friends, my family and the myriad of strangers are living. While I sit here alone in my empty apartment, watching and waiting for something, anything to happen.

    Its as if Im not real, Im just an observer here. Kooky I know, but the longer this goes on, the more desperate I get. I just dont know what to do.
  2. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    You don't sound whiney. :hug: Here if you want to talk.
  3. Kelsi

    Kelsi Account Closed

    Thanks that was very sweet of you. I wish there was something, anything I could do to get my life back. No mater how I try, it wont start back up again.
  4. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    Being out of a job sucks. I'm there right now too. Is there a particular kind of work you want to do?
  5. Vangelis

    Vangelis Well-Known Member

    I'm in the same boat myself with the whole "ghost" thing and being an observer of daily life, but there's one thing that I found myself doing that keeps me going which is learning. I enrolled into a vocational school to learn things. Currently I'm a massage therapy student and it's the only thing that makes me feel not an observer anymore, but more like I connect to my clients. They may never understand me, but I do get a good feeling inside when I help someone I don't know.
  6. Kelsi

    Kelsi Account Closed

    I work as a pharmacy tech. But I havent been able to find work for a long time. I want to try and go back to school. Im thinking of being an EMT. But its going to be awhile before I can do that. The economy sucks, I cant find work anywhere. Its just really hard. Im usually very patient, but Ive been out of work for over 6 months now. I just need something to give.
  7. privatename

    privatename Well-Known Member

    I know how you feel. I too feel as though I'm an outside observer to life. Everyone else is progressing and doing things and I'm stagnating. I do hope you find work in your chosen field. Nice to meet you btw.
  8. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Kelsi, Have you tried group therapy?? It would give you many different views on things.. It would give you real life people to talk to about whats going on.. Then you have us for support.. You need to try and find an activity that you think you would enjoy and go for it..I don't think your useless and the alone part I can relate to because I am an isolationist..
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