I am in a bad place in my life. Most of the suffering has been caused by others, but I digress. Like most of us, I am considering suicide as a solution, and like most of us, I do want to live. It is becoming less likely that I will be able to survive, but the best coping mechanism I have used is laughter. I try to laugh in public, in the face of others, when deep down I know what my intentions are. It is a depressing way to live, but it is a better alternative than if I acted out my emotions.