Last hour had a massive trigger, the thing itself was relatively small, however it has gotten me worked up. I feel awful, decided to turn all the lights off, sit in the dark and rest my head, try and calm down, it's not really helped. Tomorrow I'll spend the entire day alone in the house, in a way that is a good thing, but also bad. On Monday I have to go out and... I can't stomach it. My stomach is in knots, depression and anxiety has hit, I can't bear being near anyone, I don't wish to be seen by anyone. I have no idea what to do. I just wish I were dead.