wanna cut

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Fuzzy Monkey, Feb 5, 2008.

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  1. Fuzzy Monkey

    Fuzzy Monkey Well-Known Member

    i just wanna cut right now i want to feel physical pain, im sick of this life and i ant take it anymore i wanna go away, i didnt think it was possible for someone to hurt this bad. im ready to go away ready to stop hurting :sad:
  2. Hurted

    Hurted Well-Known Member

  3. Fuzzy Monkey

    Fuzzy Monkey Well-Known Member

    thanks hun :hug:
  4. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Please Amanda, don't cut yourself hun. I'm here if you ever need to talk. I'll help you anyway I can. :hug:
  5. Fuzzy Monkey

    Fuzzy Monkey Well-Known Member

    im srry but its to late to ask me not to, im srry
  6. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    How are you feeling today amanda?
  7. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    If your cutting is about the physical pain try and try other methods. My cutting isnt about the pain as I dont feel it it is about release of anxiety. I have tried other methods that are more aimed at people who do it for the pain. Some of the ideas are elastic band on the wrist, making a fist with ice cubes in and keep squeezing really hard. HAve a hot or cold shower. Punch a pillow.

    They may work for you, they haven't for me but some of the things that the social worker told me to do were going into a quiet room and exhale so that it hurts then inhale for 5 seconds and then out for 5 seconds. Do this for about 15mins as will slow down your heart rate so that the anxiety will diminsh over time. Another thing is a method called tapping (I think) basically you can do this even when in public as it is quite discrete. Basically you tap repeatedly the outside of your wrist. It is some old thing that is something to do with pressure points. Supposed to calm you down. I think it is just about doing something repetitive so that you dont think about it.

    The last thing she told me was... incredibly cheesy but you never know it may work. Think of a time or place that you were really happy. WHen you feel like you want to cut you think of that time and put a bubble round it. You put your self in this place with the bubble round you. NOthing can get in to this bubble. - as I said really cheesy and is not one that I have tried.

    I know that you have probably been told about these things before as I have. They dont work all the time but I have done the tapping thing which works for me as does breathing at times. I have sat there with a blade in my hand then actually put it down as I have calmed myself down enough to be able to think straight. It doesnt work all the time and I have cut myself after being given these methods to try but if it works even once it is one less scar isn't it, and one less lot of explaining that you have to do.

    ONly my boyfriend knows about the cutting and how regular it has been. However, even he doesnt know about everything. I have taken overdoses that he doesn't know about. Yet I have some explaining to do to say why I am covered in bruises ( I bruise really easily and when they have put IV's in I swell up and get massive bruises - doesn't help that I pull them out as I dont want to be saved but they manage to hold me down or whatever - which results in more bruises).

    Think about your body. I dont think I'll ever be able to wear swim wear again as my legs are covered in scars. At the moment I am not overly bothered as my weight issues and self esteem issues want to make me cover up. But what if I have kids one day in the future and they ask. I dont want to have to explain all that really. So what do I do. I am trying to stop. In time hopefully I will. It has been 2 weeks since i last did. Maybe it is the new pills that I am on. I will keep trying though. So should you. xxxxxx
  8. Fuzzy Monkey

    Fuzzy Monkey Well-Known Member

    im glad u are doing better i cut last night for the first time in a couple months. i dont cut just for the physical pain its much more than that its control, a way to tell im still alive way to tell that i can still be physically hurt not just emotionally. dave im not doing that much better they have canceled school again leaving me home alone to think of what i did, i have no mind distractors right now so idk prolly just gonna go back to bed in a few mins. thanks for the advice golden :)
  9. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    No worries. Any time you wanna chat just pm me. I know what you feel as I dont cut for pain it is a way if release when i am angry or anxious. I have been told I have anxiety problems and depression so the pills I am on apparently will sort the symptoms out more. They are trying me with counselling to see if they can try to get to the root cause of what is doing it all. Next time you feel like cutting try and go out for a power walk or something to get your heart going or run til you can run no more. If you are like me you'll probably feel like dying after as i am so unfit but at least you know you are alive in the 1st place.
  10. beauutyy

    beauutyy Well-Known Member

    im sorry you feel like this,
    to be honest with you i get this feeling alot though,i can never seem to go through with it i know the feeling of wanting to cut. its very odd because, sometimes i think it's such a great solution. but i hope you're doing better.<333
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