Want it over...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by crackedglass, Dec 17, 2007.

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  1. crackedglass

    crackedglass Well-Known Member

    i just want everything over.. i want it to end. I have memories that wont fade, guilt that wont go away. I feel like crap all the time, no one seems to really understand. Theres only one problem that is why i havent yet is for my nan i hate christmas but i cant bear the thought of her on her own for the rest of her life. I was planning to stay until she'd had her birthday but now thats past i still cant imagine her on her own. but i know this life holds nothing for me except more pain and bad times. I desperately want it over but dont know whether making someone else happy or yourself is the most important thing? but then again i dont really make my nan happy either because i dont do anything nice for her...i cant do right even when i try to. but i know i can only be happy when i am no longer here. I had the chance to go today as she was out but as im such a chicken i spent the time thinking rather than doing.
  2. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    There's a tiny part of you that doesn't want to go. Hold on to that. Me personally, I think it is better and way easier to make others happy. So that is why I keep trying. I too want it to be over so badly. But like you I have others that need me. Your nan needs you. Don't let her be alone. PM me if ya need.
  3. ophelia28

    ophelia28 Well-Known Member

    sorry your hurting please dont do anything to hurt yourself. i know what its like to have memories and pain from your past that wont go away. but the thing is its your past it doesn't have to be your future.it the memories might never go away but if you talk to people then the pain becomes easier to deal with. so please dont do anything to hurt yourself. its not only your nan that would be upset but i would and i know others would be if you did anything. pm me anytime if you want to talk. stay safe
    thinking of you
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