Want to tell my doctors where they can take it and shove it

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by cutiepie132, Aug 9, 2011.

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  1. cutiepie132

    cutiepie132 Well-Known Member

    Feeling just a bit angry right now and it's just IDK, making me feel sad.

    I'm hurt that for the 11 years I've been seeking help, that I haven't had "NOT" one doctor that could put me on a treatment plan that could help me feel better.

    Maybe if just one had the faith in me that I was really sick, maybe I would not have ever reached the point of feeling this bad.

    It makes me mad that I have to take matters into my own hands. Getting online and ordering my own blood work, and ordering an immunosuppressive medication to see if that helps me feel better, and when it actually does work, I get told I can't have a prescription for it, not that I don't understand that, but still, I feel slightly pissed off.

    I know I can still get it regardless of their choices. But I'd like to have one by my side, one who would do blood work and stuff while I'm taking this, so I don't get seriously ill from it.

    It just feels like they'd rather let me lay around dog sick where I cannot stand my life instead of doing what it is they need to do to help me.

    And the more I think about it, the angrier I get !!!!!!!!!! Kinda want to take my foot and just shove it up a few rearends.
  2. Butterfly

    Butterfly Resident SF Sims Enthusiast Staff Alumni SF Author SF Supporter

    That is awful cutiepie :( I don't really know what else to say. Is it possible to make a complaint against the doctors? :hug:
  3. cutiepie132

    cutiepie132 Well-Known Member

    No.. No matter what has happened, I really like one of them, and I would never. I don't think his intentions were meant to be bad, I'm just not sure he ever believed me when I told him how sick I was. And I really paid the price for that. The other doctor, even though they've proven to be a piece of shit from the go, I have to depend on to try to get help from because there are no other options at the moment.

    I'm leaving in a few weeks and going out of state to stay with my son's wife because the military is sending him out of state to do some training. I'll be gone for about 5 weeks. If the rheumatologist chooses to not let me stay on this medication that I am taking, I will not have time to get more, and that is going to leave me months without it, once I get back, it would take 3 weeks waiting until I can get anymore. I'll get sick, depressed, and there won't be any point in telling them that I can come and stay with her and help out, if I get this way, is there? I'm just sick of my health standing in the way of being able to fkn breathe and enjoy my life.

    I was supposed to go sign up to take college classes today. My daughter's dad told me no, can't have the truck, whatever, I didn't say a word. And he says I'm interupting his possible plans tomorrow because I have a cystoscopy in the morning. Told me to cancel my next two appts incase he has plans. Like hell I will. He's ridiculing me for being sick. I'd like to punch him right between the eyes. I don't know how people can carry such a lack of consideration toward someone else. Oh my stuff comes first. Doesn't know if he will even have plans and expects me to cancel. Well all I can say to that, is that he can take a broom stick and ram it up his poop chute, will be as close as he comes to getting any anyways. He is such a jerk sometimes.
  4. cutiepie132

    cutiepie132 Well-Known Member

    I think I will let him know if he does me that way, and stops me from getting medical care when I really need it, I will walk away from here and never speak to him again for as long as I live. So he can act like a jerk all he wants, doesn't mean I'm going to just sit here and take it, or let him get mouthy and cuss me like he did earlier. I think I'm going to spend the rest of my day in bed, so I can sleep off this stress.
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