Wanting out... (poss trigger)

...

I'm currently considering several options. I have recently found out about a job disciplinary that I was supposed to attend today - after the time of it.

If I rewind 4 weeks back.

I SH'd, and was duly requested to seek medical advice. Being awake on a Tuesday morning at 03:39 pushed me over the edge as one of my key components of my depression (my son who I haven't seen in over 5 years - his time/day of birth).

Two days later I then have a friend call police on me for a welfare check. This friend knew what I had and what she was doing was unlikely to bear anything other than an OK off of it - I'd asked for her help to fund getting the necessary prescription, and that hadn't happened at that point.

Since then I have not been into work. I have developed an anxiety of being in open public places, but somehow managed to get out to get necessary food/tobacco to fuel living until now.

I've then heard of this job disciplinary, and I have 13 days to make enough money to substantiate living where I am. I am struggling. And I cannot stop hearing the roar of *personal edit* - outside my ground floor bedroom window.

I have just placed a call to my doc, so I can see if there's a logical way to keep me safe. Although I'm not entirely sure I would want to be safe.

I just wish I wasn't so... complicated.

 

Just want you to know you're cared about here, let me know if there's anything I can do to help. :hug:

 

gary, not much more to say than you're wubbed, and we're here if and when you need us sweetie. please now that. . . :hug: come talk to me anytime

 

same here gary. Please pm me anytime(though I am not in a much better place) xxx

 

Gary hun :hug: placing that call to the doc was a good move and I hope they can help you out and don't take anything less than what you want out of the situation. You have got to keep going and get yourself well again and be there for your son when he is old to understand and make his own decisions.