'Wanting' to be depressed?

[Convergence]

I've discussed this before, but it's been a long time.

I think alot of people have felt similar. It's not so much 'wanting', but almost being 'drawn' to being depressed. Even if you're happy and ok, you get sucked in slowly by your depression unless you combat it.

I've heard some say it's a sense of security when you're depressed, because it's familiar. I don't think it's the case with me. I just get depressed alot and really want to hurt myself. I've got a bad desire to right now. Just to see the blood...

Sorry, this isn't exactly a very creative topic. And I'm probably wasting alot fo your time. But thank you for reading.

 

[thedeafmusician]

Hun it isnt a waste of my time, not at all. I know that you've probably heard this so many times now, but it aint worth it to hurt yourself... you really only end up regretting it later.

Here if you need. :hug:

TDM

 

[Convergence]

Thank you for replying.

I know it's not worth it...unless there is a reason. But I'm a bad person. If no one else will punish me for being this way, I have to do it myself then. Thank you for your kind words, but the pain never stops. No matter how much light, unless it's always there, my day will always go dark.

 

[thedeafmusician]

There is always a reason hun, always always always. Although I cant find that reason for you, thats something that you have to do yourself. Contrary to what you might think, you arent a bad person. Not at all. And as for the day going dark part... thats part of life. Its light some days and dark others, but things DO look up, even if it doesnt seem like it will, it does. It just takes time. :hug:

TDM

 

[Lavendere]

Punishing yourself is not always the solution. It's the path you choose to take from this day on. :smile:

 

[Wonderstuff]

I know what you mean hun :hug: :hug: :hug:
But trust me when I say this: You are definitely not a bad person. It's just the depression that makes you think that. You are wonderful really
I once read or heard somewhere that: "Sadness is easier because it's surrender". And sometimes, yes, happiness is a struggle we just don't feel up to.
But it can be so worth it!
...I hope you didn't hurt yourself hun :hug:

 

[Convergence]

Thanks everyone, for replying. I'm ok, I didn't hurt myself. I guess it's a good thing, but sometimes I know it isn't...

Thanks again