wanting to cut again...

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Beautiful*Disaster, Nov 5, 2007.

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  1. I'm new here. I started cutting when I was 13, it all started with erasing myself and progressed from there... 2 years ago I stopped it all... I've had minimal urges since. til now... Tonight I keeping looking around for the perfect object... I've tried journaling, its just not helping... I tried to talk to someone and they told me I pretty much have no reason to feel this way, things in my life aren't that bad... So I searched the net for a place to go to talk this out anonymously, cause obviously the people in my daily life won't be too big of a help... I am craving the sharp release of the emotion I hold inside but can't get rid of... The blood running down the cut, the natural high... But I know if I start again, it'll be hard to stop again. and I don't want it to spin out of control again. Does this feeling EVER really go away??
     
  2. jcat

    jcat Staff Alumni

    :welcome:to sf first off.
    SI is an addictive habit and hard to break, i was a cutter for 5 years and then stopped and started again this year. i was finally able to stop agin tho. if you ever want to talk you can pm me or find me on msn.
    take care and stay safe
     
  3. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    HI and welcome to the forum.

    well i must say that you find a very good place to let it all out. i´m a cutter too, since 5 and a half years ago, and i can tell you that t CAN be stopped, but you need a lot of self control. i stopped for 1 1/2 years and now i can´t find a good reason to stop it. try to not respond to the urges. try to take a hot water shower, or hit a pillow, yell and even, go for a walk. do whatever you want, but try not to restart, because it gets worse once you get used to the pain and the blood and to hide the scars from everyone(even in summer) take care buddy. and pm me ifyou ever need it.
     
  4. Blackness

    Blackness Guest

    no
    I dont think the urges can ever go away
    its all about managing them
    and you you did that!
    :hug:
     
  5. Thanks for the replies... The urges come and go. Tonight I think I'm okay... I just hate feeling like I'll always be pulled to do it again...

    Jane Doe~ I love that song. Its one of my songs I blast when I'm in one of those moods.
     
  6. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    it´s mine too. it triggers me, it shouldn´t be, but it is-
     
  7. blade

    blade Well-Known Member

    awwwwwwww hun i know what ur going through.... ive beeen through that!

    ....... and yes it will go away...... ive gone through cutting....dont do that anymore but i still regret liveing.
     
  8. Metallica*Melinda

    Metallica*Melinda Well-Known Member

    Hi, welcome to sf...
    I'm also a cutter for 11 years... The longest I've ever stopped was for a few months... but I'm glad you've stopped for so long... I believe you can do it...
    Good luck!
     
  9. Why do we cut again?? I don't know... I started to cut my upper arm, but stopped, so now it just looks like a little cat scratch... but now the desire is there EVEN MORE. :(

    Jane Doe~That song is a trigger for me... so is linkin park's in the end and numb... just to name a couple.

    Thanks for the welcome everyone...
     
  10. Battle lost. I cut myself deep again. And it felt amazing after all this time. I know I shouldn't, but sometimes you can't help it... :( I feel like I lost the battle.
     
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