Wanting too much.....

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by iNLuCiDiTY, Apr 15, 2011.

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  1. iNLuCiDiTY

    iNLuCiDiTY New Member

    Hey guys, I don't really know what to do anymore with my life. :(

    i'm 16 years of age, failed majority of my GCSE's, and currently getting nowhere at collage, i'm constantly getting in arguments with my parents aswell and have been threatened to be thrown out more than once.

    I absolutely hate my life, i have a gorgeous girlfriend which brings the only happiness into my life, i spend the majority of the days worried about loosing her since i am such an ugly boy. My friends and family keep asking me how i got so lucky, i constantly feel like crying. i've got plenty of friends at collage and have never been picked on or bullied but when i see somebody doing something good with there lives i always think to myself, 'there's no point me doing it, i'm ugly and i'm never going to live a happy life anyway' i could be in a reasonable mood and one look in the mirror and bam im upset. i hate going to party's and gig's with my friends since they get alot of female attraction, yes girls do talk to me but at the end of the day im too ugly to ever get one of them, sure i have a girlfriend but she'll soon move on to some better.

    i could be having a perfect day with my friends but i'll get home and think this happiness isn't going to last because i'm so ugly. i'm going to be a freakshow when am older, the dodgy neighborer who nobody likes. i currently have the worst hairstyle on the face of the earth, curly and frizzy all over to hide my face. I stay up late every night to make the next day seem to go faster.

    i'm having suicidal thoughts every minute of the day, the main reason is hope, maybe if i kill myself i could come back as a good looking person with plenty of happiness?

    please guys somebody talk to me, i'm crying as i right this....
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 15, 2011
  2. tweetypie

    tweetypie Antiquities Friend

    i really really feel for you .....its a horrible thing your going through right now i know theres a fine line between ordinary teenage woes and a possible condition but you really sound depressed. It appears you have a warped self image that isnt actually true ...i know you may think well u cant see me but the fact you havent been bullied in the past , have friends and a girlfriend lead me to believe that you are far from odd looking.
    Trust me when i tell you that even if u are truly unhappy with your looks now you are at a point in your life where you will be physically changing every single day till your 20s. The only reason i could see that your girlfriend would move on to someone else would be if you push her away with your lack of self esteem. Its really really hard to be confident if you dont feel it but im sure you will know that people often react not based on how we look but how we carry ourselves. If your shy and timid and walk around with your hair in your face and your head down your bound to feel dejected. You have just as much right and as much chance to have a wonderful successful life as anyone else on this planet but the people who fail arent the ones with the bad haircuts ...they are the ones who dont believe they can succeed. I wish i could be there to give you a big hug but since im an old lady (LOL) and ur a youngen it would be a bit shady like XD but please please on a serious note if you could be suffering from depression or something like that talk to someone you trust. there are many people here you can talk to ....:)
  3. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    maybe you could get some therapy and learn to love yourself better.

    If your gf didn't like you the way you are, she wouldn't be with you in the first place.

    yeah, I think it's your lack of self-esteem rather than your looks that is most likely to cause problems in your relationship

    is there counseling available on campus?

    I think that if you can learn to change your outlook on life, things can get much better for you
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