... no one showed up. i organised a party with some of my friends (12 in total) and i was going to use it as a way of saying goodbye without them realising it. no one showed up. AT ALL. feeling totally rejected now. i dont think i can go through with it now, might seem like it was over a stupid little thing like people not showing up (they dont know all the problems ive been having). i still want to shoot myself though. i might have schizophrenia, which is causing me a load of problems with people. im thinking now that instead of taking my life i want to get help. how can i cope with this rejection? how should i try to get help (NOBODY around me knows what ive been going through, ive hidden it all)?