Was this..I'm confused.

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by MistyMaisy, May 1, 2011.

  1. MistyMaisy

    MistyMaisy Well-Known Member

    I need help deciding something. o3o Earlier, as I just got out the pool, there was a bee that my mom's frightened to death of, so I tried swatting it..While doing so, some lights I had placed on the deck's railing got knocked over. Then my mom comes downstairs (she was taking a nap) and said "Putting them lights there was stupid. Swatting that bee was stupid too! Can you ever do anything right?"
    So..Was that emotional abuse? I would've thought so because I was extremely suicidal afterwards, but I also thought it wouldn't be because she had a reason to say that..?
    Opinions? :l
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I don't think there is any reason for a parent to say that to their child I am sure she would have swatted the dam bee herself if she was there
  3. icequeen

    icequeen Well-Known Member

    it was a bee dammit, she shouldnt have made you feel bad. it was an over reaction on your mums part, but dont let that cloud your feelings for her. :hug:
  4. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    from the wikipedia article on emotional abuse

    In 1996, Health Canada argued that emotional abuse is motivated by urges for "power and discontrol",[3] and defines emotional abuse as including rejecting, degrading, terrorizing, isolating, corrupting/exploiting and "denying emotional responsiveness" as characteristic of emotional abuse.

    i think one incident like you described, as painful as it was, does not make it abusive, but if it's a pattern of demeaning and degrading behaviour, then yes, it was. sorry to not give you a definite answer. i guess my question to you is how often does this happen.
  5. spiritxfade

    spiritxfade Well-Known Member

    Hmmm...unless this type of thing is common, I'd say that it's more of a hurtful, demeaning statement on her part rather than emotional abuse. That's still a terrible thing to say.

  6. MistyMaisy

    MistyMaisy Well-Known Member

    It happens at least five times every day. :l I'm scared of her some, but I wouldn't say I hate her. 3: My dad scares me more. He just sits there, silent. Never does anything hardly apart from go to work. He makes my mom and I do most the work in the house. He once threw a plate and knife at his step-son (my half brother) while my mom, my sister and I were on vacation.. It's easily recognizable that they favour my (half) sister more. I don't know why my dad does, though, because I'm his only "real" blood in the family. But she's very much prettier and smarter, so I can kind of understand. But sometimes my mom shouts at me when she's talking to my sister (e-mailing, Facebooking, etc. Sister lives in England to be with her love) and I try to talk to her, too. Even my grandparents treat her the best. They're buying her a house for when she's in college and right now, my brother is sleeping on my other nan's floor..And he has a job. It's not fair..
  7. Illusion

    Illusion Well-Known Member

    I think anything that hurts you that bad is emotional abuse, so yeah. Though I will say this.. Many parents say stuff like that to their kids. My mom says stuff like that to me a lot but I've gotten quite use to it. Try not to let it bother you so bad. It was an accident what happened and your mom was probably grouchy from being awoken. Usually something is bothering a parent when they overreact to their kids. Thats what I've noticed with my mom. She'll apologize eventually. Does your mom ever apologize or seem like something is bothering her?

    Sorry if I'm no help. You know how bad I am at advice. Though I can relate to what you typed here. By the way...

    Don't say stuff like that. You're very smart. Your report cards were always better than mine. Plus I've seen pictures of your sister before & you both are practically twins so shes not prettier than you. Even my mom agreed you both look alike when I showed her a picture one time. :hug:
  8. MistyMaisy

    MistyMaisy Well-Known Member

    ♥ Thanks. But she never apologizes, and she always says stuff like that. One time she said "I love you" to me and I thought I was dreaming.. x.x
  9. Illusion

    Illusion Well-Known Member

    Oh. Well like I said, try not to pay much attention to her being that way.