wasting time

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by sunny, Jun 19, 2008.

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  1. sunny

    sunny Member

    sorry for sounding so pessimistic but as each day goes on Im feeling worse. right now i dont know whats stopping me from leaving the house and not coming back, Im scaring myself, again!! when i feel like this, everyone tells me to ring the local out of hours crisis team but when i do they ask me why im calling and tell me to call someone else, even if they wanted to know i dont know what id say. i cant bare this, ive tried to be positive all day, hoping that this would pass but i dont think it will and im not sure that anything is going to help. maybe it would be easier to just go for a long walk.
     
  2. patacake

    patacake Well-Known Member

    Sunny , im sorry u feel so bad hunni , im here for u anytime

    *hug Jo xx
     
  3. sunny

    sunny Member

    thankyou, but im not sure i deserve it, oh well guess im just feeling sorry for myself, one of those days where i cant stop crying.

    i feel like im losing touch with everything around me again at the moment and dont know where to turn and feel like if i turn to someone they're just going to see me as a waste of time. everyones got to the point know where they just expect to hear ive messed up again. i cant believe how its all turned out, i tried so hard for sooo long to keep everything together to build something for myself and now ive let it all go, the future i had planned so carefully and dreamed of has come crashing down around me, but most people told me id never make it, especially my family. when i was in hospital all i could think is i want my mum, i never had her, she never wanted to know, then disowned me for nearly bringing down her perfect, suburban life in fantasy land.

    i need to stop hurting like this, everything has become unbearable again and i dont know where to turn, its like every where im turning theres another problem and im so sick of fighting everything by myself. but im messing it up for myself so i guess its my own problem.

    i cant even turn to therapists, that i used to get on with and trust so much because ive let them all down soo much recently that i cant even bare to tell them and everyone else just how bad im still feeling.

    nevermind
     
  4. Yana

    Yana Active Member

    I have similar feelings. I'm in a mess too and hurting. All i can do is offer a big virtual hug and say hang in there and you are not alone
     
  5. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    I hope you are wrong about your therapists. They are professionals, so they should handle your case just like they handle every one elses. f you speak up, you just might shock her. My therapist gets a kick out of me raising my voice at her because she hit a touchie spot. She tells me once we are done, that was a box full of crap and you thru it out. You wouldn't accept it if some one was to hand it to you. So why do you accept the bullshit others are handing you. I've been doing better at it. I guess my point is you need to find one who will let her hair down and open up to you.:chopper:
     
  6. Kimi

    Kimi Well-Known Member

    I suggest you that if you are easy to access to London, there is a place called Maytree.

    I don't recommend to admitted in a hospital as there were so many mentally disabled people there. No counselling happened while I was there.. It was like a cell.. Sitting on the bed and nothing to do. I was told not to cry if I want to be discharged.. But Maytree where offers you counselling and other cares.. I haven't tried this yet as they offer only one-off staying for max 4days.

    Please search on the internet if you want to go for a long walk..
     
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